I stumbled across some interesting and related articles that talk about male disposability. While discussing with several people, I encountered several views about what this meant. My father described it well, in that both men and women are disposable; but if we think about in a context against chivalry or bravery then, it’s a two-way process. And both men and women are responsible for this.
Isn’t it true that both the sexes were disposable in the service of survival? Where women risked death in childbirth; men risked death in war. When women’s disposability emerged more from biology; men’s is related to the start of socialization.
Men started as cave dwellers and continued to initiate civilizations and now that we call ourselves modern; the scenario changed a lot. As cave dwellers, there were many unknown and unseen threats from which they tried to save the women and the children and hence took the burden on themselves. They fought to save their race, territory, and expand.
Chivalry gained popularity in the middle ages when men emphasized displaying kindness and respect toward women; started showing great gallantry toward women and the codes of chivalry also got incorporated with the notion of courtly love. Men became chivalrous, yet the fight for power continued.We can’t undermine the fact that when men were disposed of in the name of sports, women were enslaved for sexual abuse.
And in this century, the scenario is quite different.We all know that chivalry is a word beyond the rules of combat and includes the code of conduct. Chivalry is marked by qualities like bravery, courtesy, honor and great gallantry toward women. And in the age of post-feminism, we can say that chivalry is the name given to civility and it’s yet existing, but not as a mass practice.
To say that chivalry is dead cannot be pointed out as only the fault of women. I would specify that a large part of it is, but the young men and boys of today’s society are not helping the situation. While many are becoming lazier and expect women to fall for them without much effort; another section thinks manliness is to overpower the feminine gender, and still another smaller section has remained chivalrous, yet they go unnoticed or unappreciated.
Many women, on the other hand, complain about gender inequality when a man offers her a hand when stepping out of the car, or opening the door. In many instances when men tried to show their respect and care for women they were misunderstood, and that leaves them confused. There are women who depict themselves as being ungrateful and don’t give men a reason to be chivalrous. Even another section of women say that being a gentleman is not chivalrous but they consider those actions to be a lack of self-love. Well, these women who remain ungrateful toward the act of chivalry or consider the practice as a lack of self-love; don’t make up the entire women folk.
There is an increasing demand for equality by women, while I think that both men and women are born differently, hence, they can’t be equal but can complement each other well.
While even today, for many, chivalry encompasses the most desired qualities a woman seeks in a man. It doesn’t matter who she is, or to which background she belongs, every woman desires a man who will care for them and eventually would like to return those actions with love and comfort.
A realistic perspective would uphold that the lack of chivalry in our modern culture is not entirely to blame on men or women. At some point, both sexes must have felt that chivalry was less than vital. The blame also goes to the cyber-culture where emotions are unreal yet courtship comes into play, where the changed definition of gains, luxury, and kindness buy out the minute aspects of chivalry from the commoners.
Photo credit: Getty Images