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The world is surprised by two Georgia cops who changed a baby’s diaper. Why? Lynn Beisner investigates.
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It was 1991, and I was the mother of a six month old baby girl when we moved from California to spend a couple of years as international vagabonds. I was spending a couple of weeks with my mother in the South before we left for Europe. She asked if upon our return we would try to settle near her. I explained that there was just something about the West Coast that I loved.
Never one to take no for an answer, my mother kept trying to find out exactly what it was that I liked so much about the West Coast. I couldn’t articulate that there was less racism and sexism. I just knew that I was more comfortable in California, that it felt more like a fit.
One night while we were at a restaurant, she was again pressing me for an explanation of what the West Coast had that the South did not. I took a break from my helpless explaining to ask my then-husband if he would take our daughter to the bathroom and change her.
He replied: “No diaper deck. I checked when I was in there.”
I groaned. There hadn’t been a diaper deck in a men’s room since we had landed in the South.
That was when I realized that this is was an example of that indefinable something that I was trying to find words to say.
“This is a great example of what I do not like about the South.” I blurted out. “There are no diaper decks in the men’s room.”
My mother laughed out loud. “Why would there be changing tables in the men’s room? What Southern man is going to change a diaper?”
I asked what about a widowed father. She answered that there was always some nice woman willing to change a baby’s diapers. And she demonstrated it by whisking away my daughter for a change.
Over the next couple of weeks, my mother told each of her friends the hilarious reason that I didn’t like the South, no diaper deck in the men’s rooms. The very idea of a “normal red-blooded Southern man” changing a baby’s diaper was completely laughable.
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And now it is 2014, and on the Today Show, we have video of two law enforcement officers in Georgia, the heart of the South, changing a baby’s diaper. They explained in a matter of a fact tone that of course they changed the baby. It obviously needed a change and as dads it was a perfectly natural response.
Yes, this case of men changing diapers made the news, but it is not because two men figured out how to master the complications and mess of diapers. It is because there is something touching and humorous about guys who look tough in their police uniforms changing a diaper. But the men doing the diaper job saw it as just what a normal person does when a baby smells like a sewer, is obviously uncomfortable because of the mess in its pants, and there is no parent available.
Sometimes I think that we as women forget how fast men are changing. In the time that it has taken me to raise that baby, the idea of men changing a diaper has gone from being laughable to normal. Guys are getting in on not just the grunt work, but also the joys of parenthood. And now there are diaper decks in the men’s rooms of just about any place where children welcome.
The idea that this is a “new” thing with respect to men is laughable. Nearly thirty years ago I was changing my daughter’s diapers even more than their alcoholic self entitled mother. Then, after my father died, we were watching old movies, and there he was, changing my diaper in 1957. There were several other scenes of my dad feeding or rocking one of my brothers, and of my mom doing the same thing. It was just home scene stuff. But, the constant portrayal of men as not being involved or doing “domestic” chores is just feminist stereotyping nonsense that… Read more »
Michael,I firmly believe that this stereotype of men was conjured up by women back in the feminist days of the 50’s and 60’s.I would venture to say that perhaps back then, men were not seen as the types to do such a thing but truth be told,the factory worker would come home after a 10 to 12 hour day and was a seen by feminists as a horses ass for not wanting to change diapers and a bigger horses as to think that the stay at home mom was “forced” to cook a dinner. I was the youngest of 7… Read more »
It’s about time and it is lovely that law enforcement of any gender would look out for a child’s wellbeing in such a tender way. Of course it could be argued that this is definitely a part of protecting and serving and it’s great to know it’s all a part of the job if required 🙂 I wish it was the norm to hear of men doing something so necessary to the work of raising (or protecting) a baby. It’s a pity there is a way to go, but we must celebrate that we are ever inching closer. I like… Read more »
For me, I’m always a little hesitant to help a child. I’ll assess whether the child is in immediate need or defer to a woman. Too many people react poorly to a man caring for his own children let alone a strangers. One day I heard my door bell ring. My next door neighbors 5 year old son was there with his bike. He asked if my nephew was in and my teenaged nephew was visiting with his dad. He said his mom kicked him out because they were watching a rated R movie and she didn’t want him to… Read more »
John – you should never hesitate to do what you know is right, just because you’re worried about how others will react. Stand strong my man
“Sometimes I think that we as women forget how fast men are changing. In the time that it has taken me to raise that baby, the idea of men changing a diaper has gone from being laughable to normal.” Sad part is that it’s been normal for dad’s to change diapers for a very long time. It’s just recently that men are standing up and saying it’s BS that we’ve been stereotyped.
^ Yeah, this was my reaction.
As a law enforcement officer myself, it’s nice to see this article, but I wish people would see these things are the norm rather than the exception, and the videos of violent encounters as the exception rather than the norm. These situations, acts of simple kindness and caring happen hundreds of times a day by law enforcement officers, whereas the bad examples happen perhaps .0001% of the time. The way the media portrays things sometimes, it’d make you think that law enforcement officers are all heaving behemoths waiting in the shadows to do violence to innocent citizens. The reality is… Read more »
I am co-owners in a company that create a product called the Wrap daddy for Dads on Diaper Duty! I lOVE this story and that the outcome was that the babies were rescued, taken care of, and that the officers did not give a second to thought to changing the babies the welfare of the children IS their “duty”! way to go!!