
I understand what you’re thinking… I only get to choose ten qualities to search for in a man?! My list is at least twice as long! Making a list and focusing on what you want from another person is a good exercise, but my challenge for you is to come up with a list of no more than ten attributes that you definitely, positively can’t live without in someone else. (If you like, you can make your list shorter.)
Making a list seemed scary and unsafe because they were scared that if they really concentrated on what they wanted, their dating options might shrink. Yes, your chances will decrease, but that’s the point of building a list — you won’t waste time with the wrong guy any longer. Because you’ll know what you want, you’ll have more control over your love life. You’ll be able to decline dates with confidence, knowing that dating a guy who doesn’t have what you need is a waste of your and his time. It’s a wonderful mental transformation that makes dating more meaningful and focused.
So, what should that list include? Everyone is different, but here’s my list of the top ten things you should look for in a guy…
10 Things to Look for in a Guy
1. He makes you feel loved.
Do you think the guy you’re with cares about you, likes you, and loves you? Sure, going on a luxury trip or having an adventurous weekend is fun, but how do you feel in his presence? This guy is worth your time if you feel special and valued, and he shows that you’re the woman he wants to be with.
2. He’s fiscally fit.
Is your man aware of the worth and significance of money? Does he spend more than he earns, or is he so cheap that you despise him? Is saving a part of his money relationship? It’s important to know that your man is self-sufficient and has a good, adult relationship with money.
Words that make ANY man devoted to you? (how-to video)
3. He doesn’t get jealous.
Is your partner pleased when you obtain a new job, get a promotion, or have a good time with friends, coworkers, or relatives without him? When something positive happens to you, being with someone who is angry and envious drains you and is bad for your mental health.
4. He respects you for who you are.
Our guy adores you for exactly who you are, flaws and all. Whether it’s just the two of you or you’re with others, he will always treat you with respect. He may not always agree with you, but he always treats you with respect.
5. He has confidence.
A confident man can apologize and defend himself, and he isn’t afraid of being wrong. His confidence brings out the best in you.
6. He has a sense of humor.
Life is full of unexpected ups and downs, so maintaining a sense of humor is essential, even during the most difficult moments. Is the guy you’re with capable of laughing at himself? Is he not too serious about himself? Humor is good for the soul, and sharing laughs with someone, both publicly and privately, is one of the most intimate shared experiences you can have.
7. He listens and talks.
(As long as he listens twice as much as he speaks!) The most crucial aspect of your relationship is communication with your partner. You have the right to be heard and to have a partner that actually cares about what you have to say. When things get tough, He should also have the desire to talk things out.
What’s it like to have a man COMPLETELY devoted to you?
8. He wants to make you happy.
It’s a no-brainer on this one. He must desire to make you happy, and he must do everything in his power to ensure that you are. However, there is a catch. He won’t always be able to relieve your suffering or put a smile on your face, but you know that your happiness is his top priority.
9. He’s self-sacrificing.
He shows you how much he cares about you. For example, you’re about to board a plane and he offers you the better seat; he stops at the shop on his way home because he knows you’re working late; or he sees a movie he doesn’t particularly enjoy because he knows you’re looking forward to it. Relationships are a two-way street; you may have to watch a show you don’t like or offer to drive on a road trip when he’s tired, but he should do the same for you.
10. He focuses on you.
Does your guy ask questions about you? Does he want to know about you? Is he genuinely interested in your ambitions? Is it possible that he has a habit of bringing the subject back to himself? When you’re important to someone, they want to know more about you and aren’t just there to put themselves in the spotlight.
The bottom line is simple — do you feel like your best self when you’re with him? A guy may look like your type, have a nice career, or have a lot of friends. Do you anticipate spending time with him? Is your relationship clear of stress? Do you have the feeling that you’re worth a million dollars and that he’d rather be with you than with anybody else? That’s when you realize you’re on to something special.
Get the devoted love you deserve using these 5 techniques…
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This post was previously published on medium.com.
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You may also like these posts on The Good Men Project:
White Fragility: Talking to White People About Racism |
Escape the “Act Like a Man” Box |
The Lack of Gentle Platonic Touch in Men’s Lives is a Killer |
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Photo credit: Shutterstock.com
White Fragility: Talking to White People About Racism
Escape the “Act Like a Man” Box
The Lack of Gentle Platonic Touch in Men’s Lives is a Killer
