You are either thinking about or have started online dating because you are looking for something. The best outcome is only going to come through being vulnerable, honest, and open.
There’s a stigma about online dating that only those who cannot seem to find love on their own, turn to the computer screen. Well, that is probably true, but we’re here to tell you, “who cares.” Your time is precious, and you have got a busy life. What are you going to do, walk around the grocery store for two hours every day in hopes that your perfect match is going to accidentally bump her cart into yours? No.
Online dating is not only a great way to meet people you are most likely not going to meet at the coffee shop on your way to work; it is also a great tool that broadens your scope and expectations in dating. We understand that you are vulnerable by putting yourself out there. The universe is destined to give you something back. We have twelve tips to help you become an online dating pro.
1. Don’t be cheap. Pay for a good site.
This is rule number one. We are going to assume that if you are on a free site that you are just looking for a hookup. You get what you pay for so pull out your wallet. You pay $40 for your gym membership to invest in yourself, why wouldn’t you pay for online dating as an investment in your future? Trust us, even if you don’t find “the one” online, the personal growth will be worth the small monthly fee.
2. Smile, you’re on camera.
For heaven’s sake, please open your mouth. Whether it’s the truth or not, women take a lot away from your smile. If it is a big and confident, we’re thinking this guy is secure within himself. If it is a sad, closed-lip grin, we’re thinking you are a guy who still needs to figure things out. Your teeth don’t have to be perfectly straight or ridiculously white, what matters is you rock what the good Lord gave you (or the good orthodontist).
3. Stop winking and send an email.
We are flattered you think we’re cute, but please do not waste our time. Communication is key to a healthy relationship; you’ve heard it a million times. Women like to be sought after, and winking is just a lame way to try to see if we are interested back. If you are interested, send an email.
4. Pay attention to what is in her bio.
We hope you read it if you are sending her an email. Those are the things that are important to her. Don’t get caught up in pretty pictures, do your research before you contact her. Tell her why you are interested, what you like about her bio, and then get on to asking her out on a date.
5. Get the other women out of your pictures.
That is so sweet that you love your mom and your best friend. Every girl wants a man who has a strong relationship with his family and friends, but she shouldn’t have to decipher whether that is your sister or your ex-girlfriend.
6. Leave your ego at the door.
Confidence and cocky are two completely different traits. We’ll be honest, good women are only interested in one of them. Make sure when we come to your profile that there is not one sign that leads to: this is your world and everyone else is just living in it.
7. Just say no to getting to know each other over email.
Be authentic, online dating was not created to be a place where you start a relationship via email. It was created introduce you to potential matches based on like needs, interests, and future desires. Dating in person is when you will find out if the two of you are compatible. You will see how she responds to tough questions, how she carries herself in public, and how she laughs at your jokes.
8. Nothing is personal.
If you are not vibing, move on. You are paying for this; you are not here to worry about hurting someone’s feelings. Everyone is here for the same reason, to find the one. Do yourself a favor, do her a favor, and be honest when things are not heading in the right direction. There are plenty of fish in the sea.
9. It is a numbers game.
The reality of online dating: the more women you date, the more likely you are to find your future Mrs Right. This can become a tedious and daunting task, only the strong will survive. Do not give up.
10. Don’t be a show-off.
A humble man is a great man. Be present and engaged in your emails and when you go out on dates. Women want a man who shares his successes and passions, but not who defines himself through them. Take the time to get to know the things that she loves, and the things that are important to her.
11. Take a selfie.
We want to see current pictures. You don’t want to have five pictures from the same family barbecue, ten pictures of you and your dog, or seven pictures of different hikes where we cannot even see your face. Women love men who love their family, pets, and the great outdoors, but we also want to get a good idea of what you look like in person. Make sure you have a range of photos that give us a good idea of who you are and what you love to do.
12. Be honest in your bio.
The worst thing you can do is set us up for disappointment when we meet you in person. Plus, why would you want to waste your time being someone else anyway? The only person who will lose is you. Don’t try to be the person you think women want you to be, be yourself.
You are either thinking about, or you have started online dating because you are looking for something. Maybe it is just to date, or maybe you want to find your forever. Regardless, the best outcome is only going to come through being vulnerable, honest, and open.
Best of luck.
Photo: Flickr/ Rupert Ganzer