It can be difficult to know what to say to someone who has lost their dad. You may feel like you are saying the wrong thing, or that you should do something more. But finding the words can make a difference when expressing condolences which is why we’ve listed out a few ideas to help. Here are 15 things that you can say to someone who has lost their dad.
15 things to say to someone who has lost their dad
“I am struggling to find the right words right now to express my sorrow, but I want you to know how deeply sorry I am for your loss.”
It can seem impossible to accurately express how we feel when someone one has passed. The words that we want always seem just beyond our reach, and it’s often difficult to put into words the comfort, hope and solace that another might need in such a dark time. This message of condolence is honest about the difficulty we can sometimes feel to express our sympathies. It can be a challenge to express sympathy in a way that conveys compassion while also honoring the life of someone special.
Nevertheless, communicating that you are so deeply sorry for the person’s loss is essential and the core of the message you should try and convey during their difficult time. They are sure to appreciate the honesty and sincerity in this message.
“Your dad was a wonderful person, and I will always remember what an incredible impact he had in my life.”
When someone who has lost their dad is grieving, it can be helpful for them to hear what an impact he had on their lives. Letting them know what a great person he was, and what an impact he made in your life, can help them focus on the positives instead of the sadness. It’s also important to let them know that you will always remember him and what he meant to you.
This message acknowledges the loss while also conveying what a great person the deceased was.
“I will be here to support you through this hard time.”
Supporting someone who has lost their dad can feel overwhelming, but being there for them in whatever way you can is what matters most. Letting them know that you are there for them—whether it’s for advice, a listening ear or a hug—can help them to cope as best they can with what has happened.
This message conveys that you are there for whatever they might need during this difficult time. It’s a simple message of support and understanding that can go a long way.
“Your dad would be so proud of all you have accomplished.”
In times of grief, it’s important to focus on what the deceased would have wanted. Letting them know what their dad was proud of can be helpful in reminding them that there is still something to celebrate despite this tragedy. This message acknowledges what an incredible person their dad was, and what a difference he made in their life.
“I am here to listen whenever you feel like talking.”
Just listening and being available to talk can be one of the most helpful things you can do for someone who has lost their dad. It’s important that they know that you are there for them, without judgement. This message conveys that what they have to say is important, and that you are there if they need a listening ear.
“I understand what you’re going through.”
Sometimes it can feel like nobody can understand what it’s like to lose a dad. But letting them know that what they are going through is normal, and that you do understand what they are going through can be very comforting. This message conveys understanding and compassion while also acknowledging their pain.
“Remember how much your dad loved you.”
In times of sorrow, it’s important to focus on what was gained in the relationship with the deceased instead of what has been lost. Reminding them of what their dad loved about them can help to keep the memory alive and give them strength in what is a very difficult time.
“Your dad will always be with you, in your heart.”
This message conveys that even though they are no longer here, their dad’s spirit and love will always stay with them. Letting them know that despite the sadness, there will be moments when they can still feel their dad’s presence can help provide some form of comfort in what is a difficult time.
“I am here for you.”
In times of grief, what matters most is that someone is there to lend a helping hand. Although words can’t take away what has happened, knowing that someone is there to support you in whatever way they can is what matters most.
“Your dad would have wanted you to be strong.”
When someone has lost their dad, it’s important to remember what the deceased would have wanted for them. Reminding them what their dad would have wanted for them can help to give them strength and courage in what is a very difficult time.
“I’m so sorry.”
Sometimes the best thing we can do is simply acknowledge what has happened and apologize for what they are going through. Acknowledging what has happened helps to validate what they are feeling, while also letting them know that what they are going through is not something that should be dismissed.
“Your dad was an amazing person.”
Reminding someone what a great person the deceased was can help to bring some positivity in what is otherwise a very difficult situation. Acknowledging what an incredible person their dad was helps to remember what he has accomplished, and what a difference he made in their life.
“I don’t know what you’re going through, but I’m here for you.”
Everyone’s experience of grief is different, and it can be hard to find the right words to say during this difficult time. But simply letting someone know that you’re there for them, despite what they are going through can be very comforting. This message conveys understanding and compassion while also acknowledging what they are feeling.
“Your father was the kind of person all of us wanted to be.”
When we look back at the passing of a father or a father figure, acknowledging that he was someone to emulate and someone who demonstrated admirable qualities can help with the grief of loss. Looking back on the positive qualities in someone can remind us why we loved being with them while they were with us, and give us a smile as we grieve. Saying that someone’s father was the kind of person we all should be like shows that we remember him with fondness and that he was a great man.
Things NOT to say to someone who has lost a father
“At least he lived a long life.”
While this may be true, it is insensitive and dismissive of what the person is going through. Instead of focusing on what has been lost, try to focus on what was gained from the relationship with their dad.
“Don’t worry, you still have me.”
This message might come off as selfish and can take away from what the person is feeling in that moment. It’s important to let them know you are there for them and will support them, but be conscious of how your message might come off and avoid taking the attention away from what they have lost.
“Everything happens for a reason.”
This can be seen as dismissive of what the person is going through, and instead of providing comfort, it might come off as insensitive. Instead of trying to explain what has happened, focus on being present for what they are going through.
“I know how you feel.”
No one knows what someone else is going through, so refrain from saying this. Instead, let the person know that you care and want to be there for what they are feeling.
-“He is in a better place now.”
This might have a calming effect, but it can be hard for the person to hear what you are saying and could come off as invalidating what they are feeling. Instead of trying to provide reassurance, focus on being there for what they are going through.
“At least he didn’t suffer.”
This statement might come off as insensitive and dismissive of what the person is feeling. Instead, focus on what they have gained from the relationship with their dad, and what positive memories you both may have had.
These statements, while well-intended, often come off as insensitive and can cause more hurt than comfort. Instead, what is needed most is a listening ear and compassion. Let them know that you are there for them in whatever way they need during what is sure to be a difficult time.
Conclusion
In times of sorrow, especially the loss of a father, it’s important to let someone know that you care and understand what they are going through. There isn’t a right or wrong thing to say in times of grief, but what matters most is that someone is there for them. By conveying support and understanding, these 15 messages can provide comfort and strength to someone who has lost their dad.
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This post was previously published on My Caring Plan.
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