20 Things He Does to Show Me He Loves Me…

Since this is pretty far outside of my wheelhouse, I’m prepared to verify my identity if necessary, and I’ve not been lobotomized.

I have found my person, of this I’m sure. Allow me to digress…

If you’ve read my column, it’s evident I’m a bit much, like in real life. I don’t have an off button, I’m a crybaby, these aren’t things that I’m upset about. Just a part of my fabric.

However, these qualities have caused some problems in my dating history. I stopped looking years ago. Every sign pointed to the fact I would always be single.

And then I fell in love with my friend. Yeah. An old friend starting a new life, and I of course have done the same, a few times.

He loves me. Deeply. And it’s evident in the things he does, and the way he treats me. It touched me, and I told him as much.

Then, I started keeping a list of all of the ways he actively chooses kindness and love in the way we interact. It was so awesome, I had to share it. I think it’s incredible, the man behind the list is very much all of these things, and then some more.

I could write a hundred of these and it still wouldn’t touch the man he is.

1. He still thinks I’m beautiful, 25 years after we first met. He tells me every day exactly how beautiful he finds me, and I don’t doubt he believes it.
2. He reminds me of who I am, not who I’m not.
3. He’s proud to be seen with me.
4. He confides in me.
5. He’s honest with me. About everything.
6. He believes in me. My abilities, my choices. He knows I’ve done the work behind it.
7. He never criticizes me, he praises my strong points, in whatever the arena. It’s like he doesn’t even see that I’m out of my element. He just points to the one thing I got right, and sometimes cheers.
8. He wants every good thing for me. All of the time.
9. He won’t tolerate anyone mistreating me, he stands up for me.
10. He thinks I’m capable of anything I entertain. As though me failing doesn’t register with him.
11. He’s a fan. A really big one.
12. He calls me the best nicknames. They make me feel like I’m loved.
13. He is thoughtful, and genuine, and kind. Always.
14. He isn’t afraid to tell me how he feels about me. Ever. It’s never having to wonder, ever.
15. He tells me about a future where we’re together. I believe him when he says I’ll be healing. I’ve already started.
16. He would go to the ends of the earth to make me happy. I kind of think literally. He’s just that way.
17. He respects me as a human. He doesn’t push my boundaries or make me feel small. It’s made me so obtuse. It’s empowering.
18. He trusts me to have his back and treat him as a partner.
19. He’s my friend, and I trust him.
20. He doesn’t accept me sabotaging us. He knows me well enough to know I’m just afraid.

So, after all of that, it’s still hard for me to verbalize the way I feel. I get tangled up in my feelings, and sometimes I get tripped up. He has quick reflexes, though, he doesn’t let me fall on my face.

He’s the bees’ knees, and I’m here for it.

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Previously Published on Medium

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