—
Q: Have you ever had one of those moments in your life when you ask yourself, Why do I bother to keep dating? People keep telling me to hold my chin up, weather the storm, but I just don’t believe it anymore. How can I find a reason to keep going each day?
To see my full response, check out the full video below. You can also find this video and many others on YouTube, so please be sure to subscribe to my channel.
.
.
Transcript, courtesy of YouTube
hello you wonderful people at digital
romance TV this is your host Alana Pratt
and I’m so touched by the vulnerability
and authenticity of this particular
question to me Alana have you ever had
those moments in your life when you ask
yourself why do I even bother to keep
dating people keep telling you to hold
my chin up weather the storm but I just
don’t believe in it anymore how can I
find a reason to keep going each day I
just want to punch them in the face when
they say keep your G I know they have
your best interest at heart of course
they want to see you happy most people
have a very difficult time being with
somebody who’s unhappy whether it’s a
mom or a dad and the kid is freaking out
trying to tie his shoelaces so you just
tie the shoelaces for them and off you
go to really sit and be patient with
someone and they go yeah I get how
you’re feeling that sounds really awful
that’s a rare person most people just
try to fix us which makes us think
there’s something wrong with us for
feeling disheartened no it’s just part
of being alive I want you first it’s
sort of like other people’s judgments of
us or other people’s wanting to fix us
can kind of like a big heavy slime can
kind of get on us so one of the first
practices when you’re feeling really
crappy don’t judge yourself be kind to
yourself and any of the energy that
you’re feeling that’s not yours you take
a breath return to sender with the
blessing access consciousness would say
return to sender with consciousness or
just all that this is that’s not mine I
let it go down a mother earth whatever
resonates with you but just know that
not everything you’re feeling is yours
so let’s just release all of that as I
said before don’t judge yourself can you
love yourself even though you’re
disheartened can you love that part of
you to not only love the successful part
the one who can successfully date-like
give compassion and kindness to yourself
it’s a very big part of self-awareness
self-esteem and connection to that deep
part in you that doesn’t require any
circumstance on the outside to know I’m
hey and that is the feeling of being
unstoppable a confidence that goes
beyond words it doesn’t come from
accomplishing all these things it
actually comes from going down to the
very center of the yuckiest part of you
and just saying hi
I’ll just sit in the dark with you and
I’ll just love you anyways that part of
you needs that kind of love in my
opinion if you’re still here and you’re
still breathing
you’re still needed I think the universe
would just take you away if you weren’t
no longer required so there is a reason
why you’re here and I think this is not
so much about dating as it is about can
you find that place deep inside you
where even if I’m even if I’m single the
rest of my life I’m still a good person
or can you find that place inside that
even though you haven’t met them yet the
universe still has my back because if
you can’t trust that the universe has
your back God has your back or you
yourself has your back you’re always
gonna be looking on the outside for
someone to complete you which gives your
power away which makes you not sexy kind
of needy so I invite you to use this
experience that I’m so sorry it is
uncomfortable suffering is eternal but
pain temporary so breathe get through it
and find that place inside you that
you’ve never been able to really be with
her or him I don’t even know if you’re a
gentleman or a lady asking the question
but what would it take for you to love
that part of you too and when that part
of you rests something very magnetic and
allowing and yeah like this vortex of
what’s possible begins to happen you
know don’t love yourself as an agenda to
so you can get the girl or get the guy
but just really honestly love yourself
just to love yourself like can you use
this as an opportunity to fall madly in
love with you and let that be enough
just for today and take it day by day I
have a lot of ways to support you if
you’re a gentleman go to get her to say
yes calm there’s a wonderful rapport
there that’s very much about this inner
game
coming to peace inside who you are with
your nobility in your heart and your
badass masculinity and blending those
two into this very like King like man
and for women I have so many different
products my how to be and stay sexy book
or my radiance DVD or my living sexy
30-day program those are all wonderful
things you can purchase and just for
free if you want to sign up for my radio
show intimate conversations live.com
come on talk to me
talk to me and the guests get to feel
like you’re part of a community that we
care I don’t judge you at all one little
bit
and in conclusion even though I’m here
to be your inspiration and your
empowerment experts and intimacy coach
etc I’m no different than you I have my
days that are really I’m just in the
corner curled up in a little fetal
position and I find that if I can let
that be okay and I can be an allowance
of her as part of me and love this part
of me just as much as I love the
confident part of me there’s an
integration that occurs inside there’s a
sense of home and safety and oneness and
approval that no one on the outside of
no circumstance on the outside can ever
take away and if this is something that
you’d like to be and have I’d like you
to also consider coaching with me this
is the result I create with my clients
it’s not time to push harder it’s
actually time to surrender and
I would love to be that space for you to
come home to the Koran show that you are
thank you for this beautiful opportunity
digital romance TV love you all and
until next time
[Music]Don’t like ads? Become a supporter and enjoy The Good Men Project ad free
—
This post was previously published on AllanaPratt.com and is republished here with permission from the author.
—
What’s your take? Comment below or write a response and submit to us your own point of view or reaction here at the red box, below, which links to our submissions portal.
◊♦◊
Sign up for our Writing Prompts email to receive writing inspiration in your inbox twice per week.
If you believe in the work we are doing here at The Good Men Project, please join us as a Premium Member, today.
All Premium Members get to view The Good Men Project with NO ADS.
A $50 annual membership gives you an all-access pass. You can be a part of every call, group, class, and community.
A $25 annual membership gives you access to one class, one Social Interest group, and our online communities.
A $12 annual membership gives you access to our Friday calls with the publisher, our online community.