5 Things That Will Make Your Relationship Thrive

We all know that romantic relationships aren’t anywhere close to being easy. Because, unlike every other basic life skill, relationships aren’t taught in schools.

No wonder an entire industry is dedicated to providing us with helpful tips on how to enjoy better relationships and we are thankful for that.

While there is no perfect blueprint for successful and healthy relationships, from my experience I think avoiding the following things might make your relationship thrive even if it’s at the brink of failure:

1. Expecting your partner to be perfect

Perfection is an imaginary space in your mind where you set the high expectation from someone. it feels so real to you because you subconsciously think what is normal to you is normal to everyone.

We all do. You can picture yourself living in perfection because you think you’re capable. But perfection doesn’t exist.

“One of the basic rules of the universe is that nothing is perfect. Perfection simply doesn’t exist…..Without imperfection, neither you nor I would exist.” ~Stephen Hawking

Eventually, you have to look at life from a clearer point of view and understand humans are bound to make mistakes and we are not perfect and we all have our flaws.

So, you should never expect perfection in a relationship to avoid conflict or breakup instead learn to be unconditional and thorough as it gives you more room to love.

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2. Making assumptions

we often see things as true regardless of their validity or possible backup. We try to give an impression or react emotionally because we believe that we have figured and know what they are hiding from us as it fulfills our emotional desire.

Worse, we often make assumptions that our partners already know what we think and that we don’t have to say it.

But If you want to make a good relationship you have to stop assumptions and ask questions you have to listen and communicate properly before taking action.

Communication could mean a lot of different things. you might need to take a step back at some things.

I could still remember my breakthrough moment with my girlfriend: we are in the kitchen preparing dinner as we laugh and play then my phone began to ring “ooh “we forgot it on the balcony on getting to my phone I saw my girlfriend phone with notification of her ex and is like they’re planning for a weekend party then it struck me for some minute.

But I resisted the urge to say something. I took a deep breath and decided to give it a night. The next morning she told me about the message that they’re planning to go couples party that we are both invited to. It could have been an unnecessary fight cause by assumption.

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3. Keeping score

Nobody likes to be reminded of their past mistakes but yet most of us keep hurting others by reminding them of their past.

We always find pleasure in deliberating on other people’s mistakes as we try to prove our worth. and let’s be honest: It’s easier to talk about somebody else’s mistakes than admitting our own faults, right?

Life is too sweet, to keep a tally of past mistakes of someone because it will ruin your relationship, and you’ll end up exhausted and upset.

Forgiveness is the key. And whenever your partner apologizes for their mistakes bury it and never go back just move on because reviving someone past mistake to validate or make up someone present issue never work, instead it leads to serious argument and it might end up getting you exhausted. worse, it may and the relationship.

So move on fully and never go back. The sweet and romantic things of your Relationship should not end because perfect balanced scorecard.

The happiness of moving on is far better than any balanced scorecard.

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4. Avoid confrontation

Do you really need to confront your partner any time they make mistakes or get you angry?

Sometimes I just got tempted to strike or confront my girlfriend anytime she gets me angry or makes mistakes.

The truth. However, we all are humans and we are bound to get angry by mistake of some action of people. Like you already know we all aren’t perfect. And yet we feel like going crazy whenever we got upset by people’s actions.

But here’s a little secret:
You don’t need to confront or go crazy whenever your partner makes mistakes or gets you angry because it leads to an explosive argument or even a break-up.

You just need to take your time compose yourself and communicate effectively and everything will be easily resolved.

Do your relationship a favor by not confronting your partner anytime he or she makes mistakes or gets you angry because it may lead to a fight or break-up.

Instead, ask yourself what’s the outcome if you confront your partner immediately. Probably horrible right? So you should just take a chill pill and communicate effectively.

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5. Stop Is Trying Mold The Other Person Into A Reflection Of You

Forcing your partner to Live their life entirely according to your opinions and expectations is the safest way to make them unhappy.
At the end of the day, they’ll lose themself to the incessant criticism and put-downs shot at them by you.

The truth is, a partner that consistently picks on their partner’s perceived imperfections and incessantly offers unsolicited suggestions on how to improve and become better on their own terms, is simply toxic. Because a loving partner is supposed to love and accept you the way you are. And not try everything possible to make you a reflection of themselves.
Besides, forcing your partner to invest all their beliefs in your opinions will cost them so much time and energy in their lifetime.

So you have to learn to respect and trust your partner’s opinions, beliefs, and overall values. Try not to push them into things that don’t align with their moral values. And realize everyone is a unique individual so we often get drawn to someone who opposite

Even Charles-Augustin the Coulomb in his mathematical description of the electric force between charged objects.

Say that Like charges repel each other; unlike charges attract. In this sense when we are too similar to each other we are more likely to find the relationship boring and less fascinating which in turn move away as we repel each other while the reverse is the case when we are less similar.

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Final Thought

Whether your relationship is passing through hell, crumbling, or just surviving. it only has one remedy which is you. And if only you get committed to your relationship and do your part, avoid the mistake that may ruin it.

Recognize where you can make improvements then all you just need is to sit and watch how relationships will thrive.

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This post was previously published on Medium.

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