Conversation is the foundation of all relationships. It’s the core that holds things together. When you get beyond physical attraction you better have something to talk about. That is when you go deeper down the rabbit hole to find out who someone is. You have to be open to caring about someone else’s story and be vulnerable to expose yours. A conversation is give and take. As mature adults we should know how to converse or recognize when to walk away if you’re just talking to yourself. Here’s five tips that can help you enhance your communication experience.
1. The two parties are actively listening to each other.
They genuinely care about what the other says. If you couldn’t care less about someones life one way or the other you both may be wasting each other’s time. Many pretend to listen because of a hidden agenda.
2. You both are present and are not distracted.
You aren’t thinking about what you’re going to say next and you can always tell when you’re in the middle of one of those.. That’s what debates are to me. Two people bouncing words back and forth like a game of ping pong or two positive magnets repelling each other. A good chat is a symbiotic experience.
3. You expound on what the other person is saying instead of constantly adding something about yourself in response.
It’s not supposed to be one sided or a one way street. Also someone asking you question after question isn’t a conversation. It’s an interrogation.
4. Neither one of you is giving short and dry answers.
The discussion didn’t even start if someone is doing this. It’s probably due to indifference. If there’s apathy involved then they’re the weeds that will kill the garden of conversing. Expose it, Call it for what is and then keep it moving.
5. You find a flow. You find a rhythm. It’s a graceful dance and verbal intimacy.
With a good conversation you’ll find it to be easy. A bad one is painful like pulling teeth. Also you when you’ve had a really good heart to heart you’ll notice its added to and enhanced your day afterwards. Iron sharpens iron.
In this time of uncertainty, adversity and unrest having uncomfortable conversations is necessary. When you actively listen and genuinely care about what another human being has to say it bypasses assumptions, prejudices and stereotypes. You get to hear directly from the individual’s soul. It’s time for us to stop belittling and talking at each each other and instead let’s talk to each other. Having respectful conversations with open and compassionate hearts can really begin to heal our world.
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This post was previously published on Change Becomes You and is republished here with permission from the author.
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