William Mize on how to stop making it so complicated.
Perhaps you are the type of man who finds most women exasperating. They seem to run hot, then spin on a dime and run cold. They’re loving, they’re purring, then suddenly their claws are out and they’re hissing. They seem to run the gamut of emotions in 60 seconds or less. And you’re confused. You’re tired. You’re riding that roller coaster and it’s making you sick.
I’m here to tell you that women are incredibly simple. Their needs are very basic. And it’s up to you to figure this out, and I can help.
A Woman Is Your Mirror
First you need to remember that a woman is your mirror. She is a direct reflection of who you are and those qualities that you’re bringing to the relationship. If you’re bringing confusion and anger, then she’s going to show you confusion and anger. If you bring love, affection and attention, then that’s what she will bring to the relationship.
Remember this point whenever you’re in the middle of a fight. If you suddenly stop screaming and getting angry, and start to calm down, then she’s going to do the same.
Remember this point whenever you’re at a nightclub trying to use stupid pickup lines to talk a woman into bed. If you start being honest and genuine and vulnerable, then she’s going to stop making fun of you, being rude and the two of you can actually have a great conversation despite the THUMP THUMP THUMP of the dance floor.
Now of course, there are exceptions to every rule. If there is abuse involved, if there is alcohol involved, if there are drugs involved, then people can never truly be themselves and your mirror is going to be distorted, like one of those that you see at the circus.
What Are you Bringing To The Table?
Before moving forward you need to sit down, have a come to Jesus with yourself and really think about who you are, who you want to be and what you’re bringing to the relationship. I can help you with this by providing you with a checklist. Trust me when I say that women are looking for very specific qualities when it comes to a man. Becoming monogamous, moving in together, buying a home, having kids together, these are life changing events for both men and women, but more so for women, because she’s going to be invested in you for the long term, and before you get to that third date, she’s going to be ticking off certain things in her mind, and you best be genuinely bringing them to the table.
In a great article over at The Life Coaching on Demand** website, coach Matthew Hoelscher runs down the qualities that a woman is looking for in a man.
Get Out Your Red Pen, It’s Time For A Test!
Hoelscher lists these qualities:
So? How did you do?
Are you bringing each of these qualities on a daily basis to your current relationship or, if you’re single, to your life?
Are you living a life of integrity, or are you just half-assing it?
I want you to click here for the complete article, where Coach Matt goes into each quality individually, and shows you how you can start integrating them into your life.
I Would Add A 7th Quality
Personally, if I were coaching you, I would add a 7th quality: Consistency
You can’t just one it and done it, you must show up, each and every day with these qualities and show her that you are the man that she thinks you are.
Remember, you can’t run hot and cold. You can’t bring strength and direction one day, and then the next day, be a weak, humorless, buzz kill.
It’s up to you to do the work necessary to bring these qualities that a woman wants into your life.
If you would like some help, I am available.
We can do this together.
**Full disclosure: I am a member of the Life Coaching on Demand website, but it’s still a great article and there’s still great knowledge to be learned from it, despite that fact.
This article originally appeared on William Mize’s Website.
Photo credit: Ben Raynal/flickr