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There are so many different, and often contradictory, beliefs about what it means to be ‘good’, what is ‘good’ and what isn’t, and the implications of being ‘good’ or not.
Which one is true, real, and valid? None. Which one is a direct representation of your own value system, and how much of that have you inherited through conditioning? All.
No belief, not even the positive ones we like to create in our own minds, is useful.
All beliefs actually do is limit our capacity to attain higher states of consciousness, which would then allow us to feel good all the time regardless of what others think, believe, or demand that we do.
Would you like to feel good all the time, instead of pursuing the unattainable goal of being ‘good’?
Here are 6 simple steps to personal transformation and transcendence of the illusory need to be ‘good.’
#1 End dualistic thinking.
When we look at the world through the lens of ‘right’ and ‘wrong’, ‘good’ and ‘bad’, ‘true’ and ‘false’, we’re bound to experience unwanted and uncomfortable thoughts, feelings, emotions, and reactions.
When we shift away from dualistic, binary interpretations and perspectives of self, others, and life, we become empowered to bring about more conscious understanding about why things are the way they are and how to effect constructive change.
By redirecting our attention from one of judgment (dualism), which inevitably leads to control or punishment of some sort, to one of inquiry, conscious wisdom, and discernment, we gain a greater capacity to effect constructive change when and where we want it.
When you end dualistic thinking, you’re presented with a world of endless possibilities. What you choose is now entirely up to you, the conscious you, rather than the ‘good’ or the ‘bad’ you may have identified with in the past.
#2 Stop resonating with the Collective Consciousness.
Any part of you that you may have identified with, whether you’ve seen it as ‘good’ or ‘bad’ is best let go of. That said, doing so, can feel challenging at first. It can feel like putting a hole in your life raft as you navigate the seemingly tumultuous waters of life.
The reason why it’s so difficult for us to dis-identify from our own self-image, and the ‘good’ and ‘bad’ that it’s tied to, is mainly because of how we’re continuously swimming in the dualistic perspectives, thoughts, and ideas embraced by the collective consciousness. Does a fish know that it’s swimming in water, or is it just moving through life?
It can seem daunting to not look at yourself through the lens of ‘good’ or ‘bad’, and to not try to defend your self-image and your personal attachment to it when everyone else seems to be doing it?
It can feel unsafe and unwise to navigate your mind, relationships, and life, and to make your own conscious choices from a place of complete self-sovereignty.
When you take a leap of faith in the direction of self-sovereignty, stop resonating with the collective consciousness, and instead start turning inwards to your own feelings and emotions as your guidance and navigation system, things start feeling consistently ‘good’ for you very fast.
#3 Understand why you want to be ‘good’.
In order to achieve the once daunting goal of no longer resonating with the collective consciousness, and becoming self-empowered, sovereign beings, it’s essential to understand why we want to be ‘good.’
Understanding why we want to be ‘good’ is not a surface level question, it’s a deep inquiry that entails going into subconscious parts of ourselves that are highly motivated to be ‘good.’
We’ve learned to be ‘good’ from very early on in infancy through the emotional – verbal or non-verbal – feedback that we received from our parents, where we experienced ourselves as ‘good’ or ‘bad’ based on how they perceived us through their own conditioning.
Over the years, this feedback and interpretation is reinforced over and over again through the different life experiences we go through, and how we perceive ourselves to either have been ‘good’ or ‘bad.’
Usually, having been ‘bad’ would result from having felt rejected, invalidated, judged, criticized, or abandoned in some way, while having been ‘good’’ would be experienced as having been accepted, validated, encouraged, supported, and loved.
These recordings and interpretations continue to feed the cycle of ‘good’ and ‘bad’ that we operate from, and the pain avoidance strategies that supposedly protect us from potential punishment and abandonment for being ‘bad.’
Of course, none of it is actually based on objective reality, and still who likes to feel rejected, invalidated, judged, criticized, or abandoned?
We all want to feel accepted. We all want to be loved. And we all want to feel safe. That is inherently encoded in us. The problem is that our interpretations and biases distort our experience of reality and of those feelings that we want to feel.
Being ‘good’ ultimately feels safer, safest, and simply safe, and that’s why we tend to gravitate towards safety and put so much effort to achieve it.
Of course, it’s an illusory pursuit since there’s no such thing as ‘good’ or ‘bad’, still that doesn’t change how we deeply feel.
#4 How wanting to be ‘good’ leads to suppression, repression, and separation.
If you need more reasons to end your chase after being ‘good’ then understanding the following might help.
When we feel the need to be ‘good’, we inevitably repress or suppress parts of ourselves that we feel could threaten our ability to be seen as ‘good’ by others.
Sometimes, we don’t even realize that we’re doing that, or that we’re being influenced by others we just think that we simply want to be ‘good.’
It’s important to realize that the very thought of wanting or needing to be ‘good’ can only ever come from a fear of not being ‘good’, or being ‘bad’.
When we trace the desire to be ‘good’ back to its root, we’re back to some fear of being rejected, judged, criticized, or abandoned, which nobody wants.
Unfortunately, any desire motivated by fear will inevitably obscure our consciousness. When this happens, it becomes difficult to remain objective and conscious of our own motivation and how it’s influencing us.
When we recognize that wanting to be ‘good’ can inadvertently lead us to repress and suppress parts of ourselves, we become empowered to understand all parts of ourselves, heal them, and integrate them in order to support our intentions and goals.
The inner conflict and separation we once felt as a result of the fragmentation we experienced through dualism can now be fully released at the root, and we can once again experience ourselves as whole, and a greater part of the whole of humanity. How good does that feel?
#5 How we can be ‘good’ to ourselves.
If being good is something that you truly want to achieve – not the idea of being ‘good’ – then consider shifting your entire focus towards being ‘good’ to yourself.
Being ‘good’ to yourself means listening, accepting, understanding, loving, exploring and feeling compassion for, ALL parts of yourself. It means feeling good about yourself right now, without any condition.
You can choose to feel good about yourself all the time, no matter what you think, say, feel, and do.
You can choose to feel good about your intentions, your goals, and your choices right now.
The best way to feel good about yourself all the time and to be ‘good’ to yourself is to completely relinquish the idea of ‘becoming’ something other than what you are.
When you accept yourself completely as you are, you’re free to grow and evolve in whichever direction you choose to, not from fear, pressure, or need, simply because you are choosing to do so.
When you operate from conscious choice, wisdom, and discernment, the pain and suffering you used to experience as a result of decisions you made and the results you got tend to dissolve completely.
All that remain are the conscious wisdom and discernment to make the self-sovereign choices that will bring you the most fulfillment and that are in alignment with your highest and greatest good.
#6 How we can only ever be ‘good’.
You can’t be anything but ‘good’. You can never not be ‘good’. Consequently, you can never be ‘bad.’
All the stories you’ve been telling yourself about being ‘good’ or ‘bad’ are only stories created inside your mind, we all have them. These stories are only supported by the greater mind of the collective consciousness, where they are first imagined and created. They’re not real.
You, and the rest of humanity, no matter what you or they do, can only be ‘good’, enough, loveable, acceptable, all the time.
When you realize this deeply and allow this understanding to sink at all levels of your being, you gain the capacity to begin to choose and act from a place of complete freedom, love, and creativity.
No longer bound to the idea, need, or requirement to be ‘good’, you are free to experience the goodness within you all the time.
You can finally feel good without the external pressure of having to be ‘good.’ That’s simply because you’re not trying to be ‘good’, or attempting not to be ‘bad’, you’re just being… ‘good.’
How good does it feel to experience yourself as being… good all the time? Don’t you suddenly feel good?
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