You won’t get this info when you sign up, but hey, you need to know.
Sometime in 2012, I ventured into the world of online dating. I was young, jobless, and not in any relationship. It was supposed to be an adventure. I mean, I didn’t really have anything to lose. But I equally had the expectation of finding true love and have my own ‘happily ever after’ story.
For a start, I tried Cupid’s online site. And because I was naïve and ignorant, my initial experience wasn’t exactly as wonderful as I expected. For instance, I remember meeting some people who gave out false information on their profiles.
Along the line, however, things picked up for me and improved a great deal before I forgot my password and ended the whole thing. But that was mainly because I had learned the ropes and gotten used to certain online dating realities that many people are still not aware of.
Just like me, many people have explored the world of online dating in the hopes of finding their true love, or at least someone that they can hang out with and not regret it almost instantly. In fact, studies show that one-third of married couples in U.S met online. This proves that the system works.
For lots of folks, however, the experience isn’t always sunshine and buttercups. There have been lots of cases of abuse, dates gone wrong, deception, fraud, rapes and other crimes committed by people who met themselves online.
Does this mean the whole ‘online dating scene’ is bad? Absolutely not. The fact that there are bad people in a system is not enough to condemn the whole system. However, it is always better not to be ignorant in matters like this, because in this case, what you don’t know may actually hurt you.
So before you sign up for online dating, make sure you are aware of these 6 things.
1. Most of the profiles on the site are inactive.
Online dating sites talk about how many members they have on their sites and it is these numbers that usually draws more people to join. Unfortunately, the “millions” of members that are on the sites are inactive accounts. What this means is that out of all that statistical mumbo jumbo the site was advertising, only a small percentage of it is accurate.
So what does this mean? If you come across a woman that you think would be a perfect match for you, there is a high chance that she is inactive or is a free member and may not be able to respond to you. And this basically makes her inactive.
2. There are some shady people on these sites.
Just like in real life, you are going to come across shady people on an online dating site. There is just no way around it. Sadly, much like meeting people on the street, you may not find out their true intentions until it is too late and your heart is already involved.
There are risks involved with online dating and it makes people uneasy because they feel like they are targets; however, if you use common sense (like not give out personal information too soon, trust your instincts, and pay attention to details), you have a better chance of spotting the phony folks.
3. The person you meet may not be the same person you talk to.
For whatever reason, there are people on these dating sites who choose to use pictures that are not their own. This leaves you fantasizing about someone who isn’t really who they say they are. And as men, looks matter a lot to us when we are looking for a partner.
Many people who do this simply want to create a better image on the site. I understand that. Still, using a picture of someone that is someone else’s is a misrepresentation and it’s wrong.
4. Online dating plays up your shallowness.
Many men who engage in online dating, tend to be a lot pickier than if they were to date normally. This is because they are presented with too many options and they feel like they are “settling” for someone. Most of us have this belief that there is always something better out there. And in theory, perhaps you are right because you are under the impression that there are millions of singles on that particular website just waiting for you. But remember, the vast majority of those profiles are inactive!
5. Your idea of intimacy is altered.
When you are talking to someone online and finally meet, it feels like you’ve known them for a lot longer than you actually have. While this is great in a way, it also creates that false sense of familiarity that tends to make people let down their guard too soon and engage in sexual acts before you normally would, had you met them in real life first.
6. Race plays a huge role in how lucky you will be with online dating.
A lot of people will say that race doesn’t matter when it comes to love. However, this report shows that unless you are a white male, you would probably have better luck finding a match who will respond to you on an online dating site that caters to your race exclusively.
Is it right? Of course not, but it just goes to show that we’ve got a long way to go before we can say that love knows no color.