A breakup is like a mini death. You’d cry your eyes out for a week. You’d think all the “what ifs” scenarios for months, and you didn’t think you’d survive life without them.

It’s brutal, but when it’s really over — you begin to see life in a new exciting way. You get your hopes back but not the one with wishing you’ll get back with your ex.

I remember it took me forever to get over my first relationship. He was all I wanted to be with, and even years after we broke up, at some point, I still asked him if he wanted to give it another try — which was embarrassing.

I’m not proud of what I did, but it’s part of my past.

It was after when I moved to the big city that I started rethinking the whole thing. My expectations to stay in his life became less and less. And before I knew it, I no longer dreaming about the old days I spent with him.

1. Your hopes to get back together has died

There’s a reason why your relationship with your ex didn’t work out. Sometimes love isn’t enough, and the last thing you want to do is wallowing in sadness, hoping for some miracle to change your mind.

If you completely moved on from your ex, a clear sign is that you no longer wish you’d get back together. You let the hopes die so you can move forward with your life.

At this point, you are logical enough that you are better off without them. Even on your weakest days, you don’t desperately want them to love you again. You just think if it’s meant to be then, they’ll come back.

But you aren’t going to wait anymore.

2. You start enjoying your life without them

“Take a step back today, look at all those beautiful things you have.” — Rick Warren.

For the first time after years of dwelling in heartbreak, I started seeing life from a different perspective. I was excited to plan things out that didn’t revolve around my ex. I could see my life as a blank canvas that’s ready to fill in.

It’s crazy how the breakup made you think that somehow you wouldn’t be able to survive without your ex. You could be so dramatic that you forget you are capable of doing so many things without them.

3. You can go on a date without comparing it with your ex

What’s worse than going on a date with someone new, but in your head, you still do this comparison game? It’s annoying because it robs the good time you are supposed to have with the new person.

But once you are over your ex, you clearly can see the difference in how you feel whenever you go on a date. Yes, your ex might be the most good-looking man you’ve ever dated, but you no longer care about that.

You are ready to open up your heart again and see what’s out there. And you know, by involving your ex on your mind during a date isn’t doing you any good favors. Especially when you know your ex has moved on from you too.

4. You stop hating on them

I used to hate my ex so much. I hated his inconsistency in our relationship and all his cheating proof that I found out, but he never admitted it. But I realized that the more I hated him, the longer I stuck in this cycle of hatred.

So I decided to stop journaling about him altogether. I stopped cursing him on my head and chose not to let the grudges took over my life.

It’s no surprise that months after that, I felt more peace.

I’ve also seen this happened to some people around me who went through a breakup. Once they stop talking ill about their ex, they become happier and freer. It’s like they got their lives back, and it’s always interesting to see.

5. You no longer care what they are doing in their life

Another sign that you are over your ex is that you no longer care what’s happening in their lives. You used to spend hours stalking their social media and think why they are so quick in moving on but now? Not anymore.

You let them have fun, do whatever they want to do. You don’t hate them, but you don’t care either. To you, they are someone who once in your life, and you learned a lot from the experience you both had together.

But the chapter is closed, so it only makes sense to treat them as they don’t exist.

6. You stop talking about them to your friends

Remember those days where you couldn’t stop talking about your ex to your friends? How badly he treated you and how you wished he’d regret it and asked you to get back with him again — it’s over.

When you feel like you’ve moved on from your ex, you don’t want to bring up about the past anymore. What’s the point, right? You are now feeling better and happy. Your life is exciting again, and you don’t want to ruin it by talking about your ex.

I noticed this difference in my girlfriends too. Usually, months after the breakup, they don’t even want to talk about it again. Not because they avoid the topic, but it’s just not worth it anymore.

7. You (finally) embrace your single life

Who said being single sucks? It’s the society that made us believe it does. It’s that perspective if you don’t get married by the age of x, then you aren’t loved. But of course, this isn’t true.

Being single after getting out of a relationship that isn’t right for you can be liberating. You have so much freedom, and you now can create a new life however you want it, without considering someone’s else feeling.

I truly embraced my single life by doing anything that I couldn’t do when I was still with my ex. And doing that helped me change my mindset and fall in love with my single status even more.

I’ve seen many single people who are just as happy as those who are in a relationship. So if you are at this stage where you start embracing your single life, then it’s really a good sign.

Hence, you should be proud of how far you’ve gone. Not everyone has the courage to walk away from a wrong relationship, but you did.

. . .

To wrap it up, here are the 7 clear signs that you’ve already moved on from your ex:

• You let the hopes die as you no longer want to get back together.
• You start feeling excited about your own life and make the best out of it.
• Whenever you go on a date, you no longer do the comparison game between your ex and the new person.
• You don’t hate your ex anymore — regardless of how much they hurt you.
• No more stalking your ex on social media because you don’t care about what’s happening in their life.
• Not because you avoid talking about your ex, but you are no longer interested in bringing it up to your friends.
• Finally, you embrace your single life. You know that you are actually much better off without them.

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This post was previously published on Hello, Love.

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