A relationship is a full-time job. Yes, it is indeed. We need to study, understand, follow specific rules, and time-to-time review our actions. We get paid in terms of love, affection, and reassurance support.
Many will deny that it is a job. However, we often forget that failed relationships arise because either we did not take it seriously, which indicates a lack of attention or we gave in too much, and nothing reciprocated.
. . .
The lockdown has switched my thought patterns. Mainly concerning relationships, somehow distance provides us a lot more information than we can cultivate from daily in-person interactions with our people.
My very close friend, suggested the book by Dr. John Gray, on the differences that one might need to ensure when approaching a man and a woman. As I am going through the chapters of “Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus,” the most important note that pops up in my head is THIS BOOK IS GOOD!! But, ONLY when both parties are ready to become observant and prepared to improve.
Indeed a relationship of any kind takes two people to give in and share their vulnerabilities. Love can be one-sided but will end up hurt. Efforts can be biased but will end up in damages.
What we seek is balance, and is only achieved when all the entities involved reciprocate equally.
. . .
Love is beyond being romantic and getting physically cozy.
The intimacy that develops through understanding and compassion is sometimes more charming than what we can receive through just sex.
Having differences amongst men and women, let alone being different as a person, a relationship will thrive on the balancing act executed by both involved.
Love comes to alive when he understands how much she just wants him to listen to her stories.
Love comes to alive when she respects his space and supports him the way he seeks her to help him.
Love comes to alive when he understands she is not complaining. She is a person of expressions, values, and compassion.
Love comes to alive when she understands he is a person of respect, honor, strength, and trust.
We often tag love to materials, achievements, financial abundance. However, love thrives amongst the small and big efforts made to abide by the commitment we made to our mates.
Regardless of our gender, we seek love in everything we do, live, and meet. The degree and grade of appreciation will vary and take different forms depending on the type of relationship.
However, it is never one person’s work and responsibility to grow that relationship.
Both men and women seek the love that will make them fly high.
When the efforts are joint, the outcome is enormous.
It is hence, essential to know the love language of the person as well as be open to understanding his/her preferences in life. Having this knowledge will be the foundation to build a fulfilling relationship where you are reciprocating each other.
In nature, the balance comes in the form of giving and take. Often, we choose to become either of these, depending on our past and present experiences. Importantly, this becomes a huge factor when we are entering a relationship.
When there is understanding, there is trust, and there is room to grow and improve. Improvements may require changes, but when the bond is strong, that change comes willingly.
. . .
Keep learning about our self as well as know how to read the person in front. It becomes easy for us to save ourselves as well as the other person from drowning in a relationship.
Keep reminding ourselves that mutual understanding, love, and reassurances make this world a beautiful place.
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This post was previously published on Hello, Love and is republished here with permission from the author.
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Photo credit: Unsplash