
When a woman is high-value, it means she has high standards for the way a partner treats her. But that doesn’t mean she doesn’t crave connection. Because no matter how independent she may be, it’s normal to want a genuine and meaningful partnership. While her actions may indicate what she will and won’t tolerate, so do her words, and women who don’t chase anyone’s attention almost always say certain high-value phrases when they talk to men.
A woman like this doesn’t have a goal of being rude or egotistical; in fact, when she speaks to men, she has no intention of shutting them down. Instead, she wants to make it clear that she has specific expectations, and if they can’t meet them, they aren’t a match. She knows her worth, after all.
Women who don’t chase anyone’s attention almost always say these high-value phrases when they talk to men
1. ‘I’m not interested in that’
When a woman uses this phrase, she isn’t trying to be rude or disrespectful. Having done the inner work to reverse her people-pleasing tendencies, she’d rather be upfront with a man than lie to him about what she likes. It might feel a bit jarring, but honesty is something that seems to be lacking when dating.
Women struggle the most with people-pleasing tendencies compared to men. According to a YouGov survey, “Women (56%) are more likely than men (42%) to say they would describe themselves this way.” So, while it may be shocking to hear a woman truly advocate for herself, men shouldn’t be put off.
2. ‘I enjoy my own company’
The loneliness epidemic continues to affect many people from all walks of life. Between failed first dates and finding it harder to mingle face to face, with loneliness comes things like depression and anxiety. Outside of relationships, the average person needs other social connections, like family and friends, to truly keep them grounded and sane.
It’s not to say that they don’t have friends or close family, but a woman is letting a potential man know that she’s more than happy to be single when using this high-value phrase. Would it be nice to find genuine love? Of course. But when push comes to shove, she loves herself enough to stay within her own company if it means keeping her peace.
3. ‘That doesn’t work for me’
Whether it’s “that doesn’t work for me” or simply “no thank you,” women who don’t chase anyone’s attention almost always say these high-value phrases when they talk to men. Especially as it pertains to her time, she remains in control of it, and doesn’t let any man waste hers.
Her goal isn’t to hurt or be an inconvenience to others; however, if something truly doesn’t work for her, she won’t force herself to go along with it. It may frustrate some men, but as licensed psychologist Jordan Fiorillo Scotti pointed out, because boundaries protect and nourish us, setting and holding strong ones help us create the life we really want, instead of one we want to escape from.
4. ‘I’ll get back to you on that’
It’s tempting to want to give a straightaway response when another person demands it. Never wanting to inconvenience someone or keep them waiting, many would rather push past their uncertainty than risk upsetting someone they care for or are interested in. But for women who don’t chase anyone, they use this phrase when speaking to men.
It might not be the most ideal response a man was hoping for, but women would rather think things through than risk changing their minds and getting his hopes up. While it’s slightly frustrating, men should take it as a green flag, because a person who is decisive and careful is someone who makes a great partner.
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This post was previously published on medium.com.
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Photo credit: Hoi An and Da Nang Photographer On Unsplash