Choosing the Best Paths for Successful Relationships

This is one topic that I am sure is near and dear to many of us: choosing the right people to show love. It can be an endeavor filled with unpleasant surprises and unforseen consequences, but on the bright side, through it all we get to learn, we grow, and hopefully, find our way to more genuine connections.

Even though relationships are a fundamental part of our existence, they can come with challenges: issues of communication, trust, compatibility, commitments, etc. Past experiences may also influence how some approach relationships a times causing them to fall into unfortunate behavior patterns.

All these make it essential that we explore how to choose our partners wisely and know when it is necessary to let go, especially of relationships that are not serving us.

The wrong people

Let’s face it, we have all been there: falling head over heels for someone who turned out to be all wrong. They were charming at first, but soon enough the cracks begin to appear because they can’t ever seem to commit, or they don’t treat us with the respect we deserve, or there is a lack of reciprocity, etc. These are all red flags that tell us that the relationship is not as healthy as we may have hoped.

The same can be said for people we mistakenly take for confidants and allies in our lives: those we trust the most can end up being the ones who let us down.

Fortunately, the signs of toxic partnerships are usually glaringly obvious and we just have to learn to recognize them early to save ourselves from heartaches and disappointments down the road.

Breaking free

Yes, I will be the first to admit that breaking free from toxic relationships is not easy. As far as our overall being is concerned, however, it is essential!

And it starts with recognizing our own worth. This is kind of like putting on a pair of glasses that suddenly make everything thing clear. It also includes setting/enforcing the appropriate boundaries. It also means letting go of the belief that we can always fix someone else or change who they are.

But most importantly, it means learning to love ourselves enough to walk away from anything that doesn’t serve us because we now realize our worth is too precious to be diminished by anyone unworthy of it.

“…those we trust the most can end up being the ones who let us down.”

Should you choose to let go, first, and this is really important, you must clearly communicate your decision to end the relationship!

Following that you may need to establish the boundaries that will protect your well-being like, limiting contact, unfollowing them on social media, etc. This gives you the time and space to process all the natural emotions that may follow like, sadness, anger, or even relief.

The right connections

So, how do we attract the right kind of people into our lives?

Well, I’m no guru, but what I do know when we love ourselves fiercely and unapologetically and are open to new experiences when the right people come along, as they always do when the time is right, we will be ready.

I have also that you need to trust yourself! Trust your instincts, trust your heart, and trust that you deserve nothing less than the kind of relationships that nurture your soul, uplift your spirit, and inspire you to be the best version of you day in, day out.

“This is kind of like putting on a pair of glasses that suddenly make everything thing clear.”

So, as you continue your journey on the road of life take to heart the lessons you have learned along the way: not only from any unhealthy relationships you had to endure, but from possibilities you know exist from the truly genuinely fulfilling connections you have formed along the way. Those genuine connections are how we know relationships can indeed bring joy and fulfillment to our lives.

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This post was previously published on medium.com.

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From The Good Men Project on Medium

What Does Being in Love and Loving Someone Really Mean?

My 9-Year-Old Accidentally Explained Why His Mom Divorced Me

The One Thing Men Want More Than Sex

The Internal Struggle Men Battle in Silence

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