Oscar Wilde once said, the heart was made to be broken. Wai Sallas wants you to know there is life after heartache, and it starts with you.
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I know it’s tough.
You thought they were the one. You had your doubts at the onset, but somehow, someway you were sucked in, and now you’re sitting there wondering what happened.
Of course I could be talking about the dirt ball of a man/woman who accepted your heart and caressed it for a temporary moment of exhilarating pleasure only to have that same poor excuse of a person throw it down and stomp on it like they were smashing grapes for a nice California Pinot. But no. We’re not talking about that type of heartache.
We’re talking about that team, the one you thought was finally going to give you the glory of a championship to flaunt at all your friends. The one you thought was finally the one. The team who was going to finally help you realize what it felt to be a champion.
I want you to know, it’s not your fault.
Let’s start with the numbers. There are 6.8 billion people on the planet this month. The average global life expectancy is now 70 years. At 365.25 days per year, that amounts to 25,567 days. For the sake of this mathematical equation, we will assume that everyone on this planet goes through at least two breakups in their lifetime . . . . Now let’s keep this number conservative, because you could be like Bono and marry your high school sweetheart, avoiding heartache all together. Or, you could be like Taylor Swift, and go through the pain of loss every couple of months.
At two major breakups per person’s lifetime, that would amount to a total of 13.6 billion breakups across the lifespan of everyone on our planet right now.
So across your lifespan, 13.6 billion breakups should occur. And if your lifespan is the average 25,567.5 days, then you can expect that on each day of your life, (13.6 billion divided by 25,565 days)…at least 531,925 people will be breaking off their relationships as well.
Do you care about that right now?
No.
♦◊♦
Your favorite team just lost the big game and you are heartbroken. The first thing you have to realize is the sun is shining, the birds are chirping, perspective is key.
While you are staring blankly at the TV screen as confetti showers down from the rafters, you might be thinking, what happened? Why me? Why us? Well guess what, there are people who don’t even own a television. In 2011, the percentage of television ownership in the United States dropped form 98% to 96%. Thank your lucky stars you aren’t part of that 4%.
No matter how bad you think things are, there is always someone who is struggling a bit more than you. Your team lost in the championship game, someone’s team didn’t even make it. There is so much in this world to be thankful for, find yours and realize as bad as it may seem, there’s always a Cleveland fan. (I kid, I kid.)
Besides that, It’s not you, it’s them.
♦◊♦
You cheered your ass off for months and months and months. During the losing streak, you kept faith that they would right the ship. When they were winning, you were the one refusing to wash your underwear because you thought they were good luck. True fans sacrifice whatever they have for that one chance at glory.
You did that.
Is it your fault that no matter what defense Arizona deployed Wisconsin just kept making it rain like they were a newly minted millionaire at the strip club? I mean Sam Dekker would just catch the ball and shoot. I swear sometimes he wasn’t even looking at the basket. He was looking at the closest mirror to make sure his hair was still in one beautiful piece.
But I digress.
You can only do so much. Love is a two way street and sometimes when the love isn’t returned you have to just chalk it up to experience and move on. Don’t torture yourself, you’re not the problem. You’re great, just the way you are. Sometimes you roll a seven and win and sometimes you hit seven and crap out.
Above all else though, remember there are many fish in the sea. Now I’m not condoning switching teams, because that is an unconscionable act that should be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law. What I’m saying is there is always next year. Hope springs eternal for all of us. Next year brings a new day; new flowers, new seasons, new cancelled television shows and new hope.
So keep your chin up buddy. She may have broken your heart this time, but in the words of every Cubs, Browns and Bills fan, there’s always next year.
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Photo Credit: BRUNO MAGALHAES / AP
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