Question: If you are just friends with benefits but that person has a birthday coming up, are you obligated to buy them something? I just don’t want her to get the wrong idea.
Answer: I begin my answer with the quote from Albert Einstein that says, no problem can be solved from the same level of Consciousness that created it.
I say that because the energy and consciousness of where you’re asking this question from isn’t the energy of a noble badass who acts from kindness and his heart no matter whether the person is your wife, a friend with benefits, your kid’s teacher, a lovely neighbor or coworker on a project.
It’s just what kindness would do.
It’s just what thoughtfulness would do.
It’s just what love would do.
To think that somebody doesn’t deserve kindness or thoughtfulness just because you’re having sex with them really makes them into an object to be used not a human to be honored and savored.
If your intuition is accurately picking up that she would like more than friends with benefits and that giving her a birthday gift when give her the idea that you wanted more than friends with benefits then that’s your job to be Brave & Bold and communicate with her in a straight, kind, honest manner and not play any games, withhold truths OR birthday gifts.
Just because you don’t want to spend the rest of your life with somebody or even be in an exclusive monogamous long-term relationship with them, doesn’t mean they don’t deserve being treated humanely with respect and kindness.
In my video I went into communicating in what I call ‘the sandwich,’ to support you and getting on the same page with this person so that you can both enjoy your sexual relationship and share thoughtfulness and kindness from your Noble Badass Heart.
Open your heart and have it live in unity with your mind.
If you do that, I know you will make a decision you will be proud of.
Intimacy Expert Allana Pratt is a global media personality who awakens open-hearted, unapologetic living after heartbreak. A Guest Expert on Huffington Post, People Magazine, Forbes, The Jenny McCarthy Show, and featured as an Icon of Influence, this Ivy League grad is the Author of 4 top-selling books, has interviewed Whoopi Goldberg, Alanis Morissette, and Dr. Bernie Seigel and hosts the edgy podcast “Intimate Conversations”. A certified coach, Allana was asked by Leeza Gibbons to coach her during Dancing with the Stars. With over 4.5 million viewers on YouTube, Allana is the go-to authority when struggling to trust again after heartbreak. She offers private coaching and retreats to support her male and female clients finding the relationships they deserve.