Midlife Crisis you say? Life has passed you by? You are afraid of death?
“Another flipping opportunity for growth !”- Attributed to Browse Nin, Bon Vivant, while playing life size jenga.
Once upon a humanity we died at like 20. The only things we needed to be afraid of were the Wooly Mammoth trampling us, or the velociraptor swooping in and eating us like a bug. (Yes, I am fully aware of the human/dinosaur conundrum)
The challenges we face as adults now are much different. The choices we made at 25 are often much different than the things we want/need at 45 and beyond.
Maybe you got married, had kids and house in the burbs. Maybe you carried all you owned on your back like a turtle for 20 years , walking the earth. Maybe you chose the military, with it’s ease of thought and expectations.
And then, you finished the first part. Kids did not die and are doing the “being a young adult” thing. You finished your tour of duty. You have a solid career and a 401k. You know exactly who you are, for better or worse.
Your back does loud things in the morning. You sound like a little old person hawking up spit.
Hair has sprouted in weird places and the young, beautiful you has been swapped out for a softer, rounder, smarter model.
You spend an inordinate amount of time listening to the butt rock of the 80’s, mourning the loss of of your glorious mane.
You are now confronted with the next 20-30 years without a plan…
My path was unconventional, but it has all the same stuff other people’s paths do. That is the core of the human experience—we all do the same stuff in slightly different ways.
It makes you a child of the tribe of human—that guy in the car next to you is indeed your bro.
He may be the mooch who keeps trying to borrow 20$ every time you see him, but he is another space traveller on this strange trip floating in his flesh suit next to you.
“This is another fucking opportunity for growth- there isn’t a lot of later left.”
Confronted with the naked demand of this statement—that you have to grow, that you don’t have time to not try—it’s exhilarating.
Not in the way it was when you were 20, where all was shiny and easy. This adventure comes with judgment, and resources.
I invite you to not give in to the idea that you are old. Look around you and see the way other people have done their thing.
It’s not a question of thrashing down a new path, it’s finding one that has already been trod upon that your feet are equal to. That guy who keeps trying to borrow 20$? Ask him about his life. It may lead you in a new direction, one you would never have thought of on your own.
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