Christina Fitzgerald on why age difference can actually make a relationship work.
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I’m 45. I’ve been through two unsuccessful marriages. I drive a red Camaro. I guess you can say I’m in the throes of a major midlife crisis. I’ve been checking a lot of things off of my bucket list. One of them was to try my hand at stand-up comedy. The first thing you learn in Stand-up 101 is “write what you know.” I’ve had a lot of life experiences one could label as interesting, but my current dating situation is certainly fodder for comedy –- and maybe it shouldn’t be.
This is not a new thing. Some men prefer older women, including my Mom’s husband, my best friend’s husband and my boyfriend. It’s just not unusual. Hollywood wants us to think it is. As to the stereotypes, sure, I’ve heard “creepy” used in reference to the older man-younger woman matchup, but not as often as it’s just an “accepted reality”. Like this tidbit: ATTRACTION FACT An analysis of online dating profiles found that when it comes to pure physical attraction, women prefer men that are their age (or maybe a year or two older). Men, regardless of their own age,… Read more »
Christine, best wishes for your happiness together, and thanks for a thought-provoking article….which is why most of us are visiting GMP in the first place.
My parents were good friends with another couple who were 15 years apart in age, him being the younger. They got along so well and regarded each other with great respect. You could feel both the chemistry and the effort they put into the relationship anytime you were in the same room; they liked each other and they worked to communicate.
This article was re-run by The Good Men Project, which is how I encountered it, so pardon me if this comment ends up on xojane.com, which was not my intention. I’m not sure how this constitutes being a good man (besides the obvious adolescent double entendres)? The article is fine if that’s what chosen to write about, but it really speaks not at all to what constitutes being a good man or anything similar. Thanks – Tom
ditto
I am not sure what she means by the ‘old double standard thing’. At first I thought it was that it OK for a man to be in his forties and be dating a girl in here twenties but that can’t be it, because actually society looks down on that WAY MORE than the OPs situation. A woman in her forties dating someone much younger is empowered but reverse it and the man is a creep and a dirty old man.
So what is the double standard she is referring to.
The double standard I think she may be referring to is that it does not happen as much, or very much at all, in this particular flavor. And that there is a bad reason for it being so, as few complain about good double standards.