Ifyou want to destroy a so-called High Value Man, it’s quite simple. Don’t accept his label as a “High Value Man”.
You don’t have to argue. You don’t have to let him try to convince you otherwise with his words.
You know what a High Value Man means to YOU. He has his own definition of High Value Man, and that’s fine. That’s his right.
He can think whatever he wants about himself, but he can’t force you to believe it.
…
Tome, a High Value Man is a humble man. Why? Because humility is a rare trait, and since it’s so rare, that makes it VALUBLE.
But there’s much more. A High Value Man gives me three things no other man can give me:
- Peace of Mind
- Renewing my spirit
- He’s in the same “vibe” as me
He gives me peace of mind by making me feel safe. I know I don’t have to worry about him harming me. But it’s not just physical safety. I know my heart is safe with him, as well as my mind and spirit. He’s my guardian in every sphere, and I never have to question whether he will cheat, if he will abandon me with children, if he will waste family money on himself or betray me in any capacity. I’ll know my guy is a rock, and if he makes a mistake, he will repent and correct the error and make up for it so he doesn’t damage my trust in him.
He renews my spirit by connecting with me, being genuinely interested in who I am as a person, and being happy to be my best friend and life partner. He is, of course, the head of the household, but he knows that being the head means he has greater responsibilities, not less. And he knows to lead with integrity. He has to show me his trustworthy and hardworking. That doesn’t mean he’ll do everything right, but I can trust he was trying to, and he won’t quit till he gets the job done.
He shows me what I’ve rarely seen, what I am desperate to see. A man of honor and light. And because a man like this is very rare and precious, even to God, his value is immeasurable.
And lastly, a real High Value Man is in the same vibe as me. That means he has the same values, and a similar world view to mines. I like BIG CONCEPTS, like bringing peace to earth and advancing Gods Kingdom of light. lol. And to one man, these things might seem silly or impossible, but a man in my “vibe” is right beside me, because he knows that nothing in the world is impossible.
It also means we both want a High Value Relationship. A High Value Relationship to me is a transcendent relationship. They understand each other, trust each other, and honor each other. They become what God intended for Adam and Eve in the Garden. Two becoming ONE.
…
Photo by Marisa Howenstine on Unsplash
Now can Kevin Samuels or any of these other self professed “High Value Men” give me that? Probably not! Another aspect of a high value man, in a romantic relationship at least, is that he has to actually like women.🙄 That’s part of his humility. He understands he’s a soujourner on this earth, learning as he goes, just like women are. So why hurt and abuse them while you’re lost in confusion? A good leader would try to build comradery with women as we both figure this world out.
And that’s how you destroy a High Value Man. You compare him to your values. The things you might find valuable in a man might be different from what I find valuable in a man. That’s perfectly okay!
Find what works for you, and let them find whatever works for them. That’s how we’ll all get one step closer to happiness in this world. One act of understanding and selflessness at a time.
❤️
—
This post was previously published on medium.com.
***
You may also like these posts on The Good Men Project:
 White Fragility: Talking to White People About Racism |
 Escape the “Act Like a Man” Box |
 The Lack of Gentle Platonic Touch in Men’s Lives is a Killer |
 |
—
Photo credit: Ameer Basheer on Unsplash
