Question: if you can’t afford a lengthy divorce and you’ve tried everything else like counseling and therapy, what do you suggest to people do with each other?
Answer: thank you for reaching out, it sounds like you really have put time and effort into trying to either make the marriage work or completed in a honoring way through counseling and therapy. How frustrating that none of that is working. I also appreciate that you’d rather not spend your money on a lengthy divorce, who would?
I’m a little confused honestly though about your question about what to do… If you’ve tried everything and you’ve given it your best shot, then just MoveOn. File for divorce and move on. I don’t understand what you mean by what should you do with each other?
We can’t control another person, we can be the space for the greatest possibility of contact, connection, empowerment, listening and understanding… But ultimately we can’t make the other person do shit.
So what if you just let go and move on with your life and focused on your future rather than more and more fighting and disagreeing and beating your head against the wall?
This makes me question if you secretly eenjoy torturing each other subconsciously… Rather than move through the fear of creating a new life on your own.
Sometimes we would rather stay with the hell we know… Rather than embark into the unknown which is uncertain… And we become victims and blame other people rather than take full responsibility and sit in the fire and MoveOn, even if we don’t know what’s going to happen. At least were in charge.
Bottom line I want you to know that your ex doesn’t have any power over you, the situation doesn’t have any power over you, what seems to be in the way is your hanging onto thoughts or emotions or points of view… That things are unfair, that things shouldn’t be this way, but things are not to have turned out this way, how could things be this way, how could they do this… do any of those statements sound familiar as the thoughts that are running around your head keeping you from moving forward?
Notice where you’re focusing because you’re going to get more of it. My suggestion is that you calmly in a center grounded way, grateful for all the lessons you’ve learned, appreciative for all the invitations for growth that are being presented to you… And lean in… And let go… And MoveOn. Bless them. Release them. And honor your truth and create the life you desire. It all comes down to a choice.
Of course that’s way easier said than done, isn’t it? I sure as shit couldn’t do it on my own. Even though I am a coach with a full coaching practice, I have my own coaches… Yes not just one, too! I need all the help I can get so that I can be on my a game for my clients.
Going through something as challenging as a divorce requires support. So if I can be of service to you or both of you, it would create a path of greater ease and surrender and empowerment, I would be privileged. You can reach out and connect to see what’s possible with allowing me to support the two of you any discounted $97 introductory session.
It’s very possible that your pass counselors and therapists were wonderful for the issues of the past… But what you require now is someone with my quantum psychology deep transformative energetic processes that go straight to the core of both of you so you can both live in truth with honor and create the lives you desire.
Never give up, stay grounded and lead with your heart, it’s all gonna work out, great love, Allana