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Searching for a place to live is similar to searching for a partner. It’s a very personal choice and you need time to figure out what suits you. You may visit a really luxurious palace with friendly roommates but you will not be interested in it for various reasons. Likewise, a solely beautiful or handsome partner is not the only reason to choose them. So here are some recommendations that apply to both searching for your home and your partner
Identify Your Deal Breakers
It is a simple and straight, yes or no. You cannot tolerate certain aspects of a person no matter how insignificant a trait you don’t like might sound to others. Similarly, when you look for a house, there are factors that don’t appeal to you but if a characteristic is not what you want, you shouldn’t have to compromise. Have deal breakers but limit their numbers too many of them don’t serve any good. Apart from the property details, you might be a person who does not go well with people who are heavy drinkers.
What are You Expecting out of Your Relationship or Home?
The relationship might be with the house, your roommate or romantic partner. Are you looking for a long-term relationship or just a few dates? Similarly, what do you want from your living place? Are you planning to stay for a long time or for a short span of time? When you have decided it is time for a long-term purpose, put a lot of thought into it in though, in order to make a wise decision.
Look Beyond the Internet and Pictures
There is no shortage of dating and, real estate websites and applications. The pictures and descriptions posted in them are highly deceiving. Do not fall for just the well-written profiles and property descriptions. Go out and check for yourself. Before you hook up with someone over the internet, meet them and have a friendly chat to know how they are as a person. Go see your property and verify all the details listed out. After all, everyone knows the power of Photoshop, so take a look at the real world apart from just the knowledge you gained over the digital world.
When You Meet in Person, ask Detailed Questions
Don’t refrain yourself from questioning. It is always good to make informed choices rather than a hasty decision. However, it could make the person uncomfortable (either your date or roommates) if they feel you are asking a lot of questions. So to keep things comfortable, start a friendly conversation and ask questions in a frequent interval. What are the benefits and challenges that come up?
Don’t Get Desperate
Desperation leads to clouding your judgment. Don’t worry that you will end homeless or single. Go through all the details presented and make an informed choice.
Communication or Proximity
While dating communication plays a major role, similarly your place of stay’s proximity to your workplace or university is as important as well. Staying in a good place with nice roommates but miles away from the place you visit daily will lead to a stressful amount of travel. Lack of communication in dating will lead to unnecessary stress, you really don’t know what your partner is up to and the restless feeling sets in.
Gifts and Maintenance
They are inevitable when you have decided to stay in a place which was well maintained and handed over to you in a perfect condition, you will have to pay attention to maintenance issues after some time. Your partner may be close to you but relationships come with expectations and you need to add some amount of excitement to it. Surprise gifts or parties make you partner feel that this is the first time you met them. This could take any relationship a long way.
Don’t Be a Rule Maker
Be it with your roommate or partner. Don’t go parading your rules over them. Everyone has their own comfort zones; don’t try to pull them out of it for your sake. This will eventually lead to a fallout of the relationship and you will be tagged a “control freak.” Don’t intrude into other’s personal space.
Don’t Let Them Be a Rule Maker Either
In the same manner, your roommate or partner should not object to everything you do. You may do one or two things for their sake but adhering to their whims and fancies should be avoided. Helping your roommates in times of need or extreme conditions is fine but let them not throw all their chores at you, this hold for your partner who expects to carry out all their tasks for you.
Don’t Become too Dependent
When you are staying with roommates don’t expect them to do you all those little help. You cannot expect your roommate to clean the mess you make neither your partner can help you with everything in life. Becoming emotionally too dependent in dating comes with lots of troubles. The absence of your partner leaves you broken and difficult to pick up from those shackles.
Adjust Your Expectations
It is a part of any relationship. You may have expectations or deal breakers but everything is not going to fall in place perfectly. There are going to be things which are undesirable. You have to learn to adjust. Being stringent about your expectations is baseless and creates unpleasantness to everyone involved. So you are not going to end up in a dream property or with friendly roommates, there is nothing called ideal.
Know When it’s Time to Move on
Well as much as adjusting to each other is necessary, you know when you can no longer take it and it’s time to say goodbye. The line between adjustment and time to leave should be drawn by you. If you are not comfortable or happy with what you are doing, it is the first step to look for a change.
You may not be able to follow each and every of the above stated points but make a try. These are the ideal “do’s and don’t’s” and there is nothing like ideal in this world. It is ok to be flawed and filled with imperfections.
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Anand Rajendran is CEO and Co-Founder of Zoplay, best PHP scripts development company located in India. Zoplay is a part of Casperon Technologies a leading social and mobile development company which developed a Dating Script called Zodate. I’m a Tech geek, Digital marketing expert, Entrepreneur, and Atheist who loves to write everything about PHP Scripts and mobile application development.
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