How the Most Successful Men in the World Use Discipline to Fuel Confidence

Behind every successful man, there’s discipline. The athlete who works out on Sundays. The businessman who picks up the phone to make another sales call in a shaky economy. The shy guy who fears rejection but approaches the girl at the bar anyway.

All of them take the plunge daily. And build a strong foundation of confidence in what they do. What if you could mimic their success? (read all the life lessons I learned here)

A matter of self-respect

Not keeping your word is the fastest way to lose self-respect. And if you don’t respect yourself, your confidence shrinks with time. You’ll have zero trust in the person called ME. However, it works in reveres. The more you do whatever you said you would, the more confidence you build.

The Golden Triangle for rock-solid discipline

You can practice self-discipline. You can become so immersed in it, it becomes part of your DNA.

1. Goal setting:

I like the idea of taking a big goal and breaking it down into small, achievable goals. It quickly provides a sense of accomplishment and drive and builds momentum. Let’s say you want to lose 10kgs. What does that mean in practice?

A. Maintaining a calorie deficit

B. Working out

C. Doing it for four months.

Then, you solve these goals and break them down into smaller tasks. To maintain a calorie deficit, you calculate your TDEE, Then take %20 off. You count calories throughout the week and weigh yourself every morning to ensure you’re on the right path. You cook your food. Then, you do the same with B and C.

The moment you start operating that way, something wakes up within you. A subtle sense of control, strength, and freedom. The wheels of confidence start spinning.

2. Routine and structure:

This is how you stick to your goals. You set up a specific system to get things done. With the weight loss example,

you say, “I’ll workout on Monday, Wednesday and Saturday. I’ll cook my food every three days. I’ll use a coach to build a workout plan. He’ll also keep me accountable”.

A Solid structure increases the sense of control and predictability. You “automate” yourself. You take thinking out of the equation.

You stick to things even if your mood fluctuates. It teaches you that motivation is a random feeling you can’t trust. It teaches you self-discipline is the key to living your dream life. And increases your confidence daily.

3. Delay gratification:

The world is full of temptations. When you hold your ground, your self-efficacy improves. It starts with the little things. No doom scrolling. No killing time with NetFlicks. No online shopping because you’re bored.

Your discipline starts to build.

Then you delay bigger gratifications: Porn. Sexual fantasies. Fast food. Going out with your friends three times a week. The more you remove your crap habits, the more confident you get.

Pitfalls to beware of

Discipline in action tends to bring up a few sticking points people experience:

Procrastinating your goals:
There’s a whole industry around this topic with dozens of theories and tips. I honestly think there’s WAY too much fuss about it, though. What? You can’t keep it together for a few hours? Come on. Adults get shit done when something is important enough.

Cut the excuses. Find something you love and let it pull you in. If you keep delaying tasks, either you’re not in love with what you do or don’t see its value.

2. Managing time:

this is impossible. You can’t manage time. Time moves forward whether you like it or not. You should manage your energy instead. Diet, sleep and exercise. Do These routinely, and you’ll turn into a productivity bomb.

You’ll go to work fully motivated. Hustle on your side project. Hit the gym. And your drive to succeed will increase.

Conclusion

If it was easy, everybody would be doing it. However, there’s nothing complicated here. It might be tough, but simple. Once you start spinning the wheels of discipline, it turns into a huge, unstoppable snowball.

Get my free ebook, “Life Lessons From Getting Rejected by Hundreds Of Women”

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This post was previously published on medium.com.

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From The Good Men Project on Medium

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My 9-Year-Old Accidentally Explained Why His Mom Divorced Me

The One Thing Men Want More Than Sex

The Internal Struggle Men Battle in Silence

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