How to Build the Best Chapter of Our Lives

Recently I have been targeted with articles that talk about how to make your life better by doing more. ‘10 ways to…’ ‘How to…’ ‘Are you running out of…’ ‘How to land…’

More, more, more. How much more can we do in life? How much more can we push, how much harder are we supposed to try?

This got me thinking: what if instead of doing more and more and more we dare to do the exact opposite? What if instead of piling on more than we can handle we clear the path instead for what’s to come? What if we need less, and not more, to be who we want to be and to find the kindred souls we are looking for?

One thing is for sure, my friends: when we go on vacation we don’t just pile on clothes to the ones still laying in our suitcase from our previous trip. We remove the clothes, we empty that suitcase and we have a thought around what we actually need on our upcoming journey.

So where do we begin to build the next chapter of our lives, if our next chapter begins today?

We begin with the most important part of our journey: the company.

Who are we taking on the next chapter of our journey? Where do we meet our new travel companions?

Sometimes I imagine we are magnets.

We wander around on our own, at times picking up stray coins, other times attracting other magnets weaker than us or getting stuck to powerful ones we struggle to detach from. We know our whole being is stuck to them whilst they barely notice we exist.

Sometimes we don’t want to attract anything at all, we want to be alone, so we cover up, we isolate ourselves, we take time to be home, to read, to work-out or just to be in nature.

Just like magnetism, human connection is a force that is often hard to control. For us to have a bit of control over it, we either need to be the stronger magnet or to cross paths with another that holds exactly the same power, what I like to call, a perfect fit.

Let’s talk about baggage.

At times, we have random coins attached to us. Where did they come from? They must have been laying around unnoticed at the bottom of our purse or in our back pocket and attached themselves to us.

These coins and magnets that are stuck to us are likely taking up quite a bit of our magnetic power.

If we want to be at full power, we are responsible for clearing our own magnetic field and for removing anything latched on to us that is sucking our energy out with no real purpose.

Do you really need to carry all this baggage everywhere you go?

To be clear, coins can be short term flings, people who have crushes on us, friends who take and never give, small magnets are people we liked at some point but who are not quite right, friends who are lovely but don’t match our energy.

Larger magnets we encounter are people who come into our lives full force, attractive magnetic people who are all wrong for us. Sometimes they appear to be large in size but they are in fact nothing but arrogant pricks.

Wait. If I cut all of these people out of my life, won’t I feel lonely?

We may think that if we remove everyone that we have uselessly been talking to, we have been flirting with or whom we are dating we will feel lonely, but most likely what’s making you feel isolated is that sense of disconnect between your own power and the power of the people who are latching on to you for no reason apart from fear to be lonely.

Let’s define loneliness first. For this, I turned to Google:

Loneliness is a subjective, unwelcome feeling of lack or loss of companionship, which happens when there is a mismatch between the quantity and quality of the social relationships that we have, and those that we want.

You can find the source here.

A disconnect in magnetic fields.

Because smaller magnets and coins are taking up your magnetic power, another magnet of the same size and caliber is unlikely to feel your presence even if you are in the same room. You are operating at a fraction of your full power.

This means that you will continuously have this feeling of loneliness as you keep trying to match your force of love with smaller sources of love, such as coins.

It may seem counterintuitive, however, if you want to stop feeling lonely, or if you are ready to attract people in your life who see and nurture your light and power, the first step you need to take is to cut off all those lovely people who just don’t match your energy, those who are in fact most likely, stealing yours.

We have to kindly invite the smaller magnets we picked up (who seemed like a good idea at the time) who are just not a good fit for us, to go elsewhere and to come visit once in a while when we both have time.

Trust me, it’s in both parties interest to let them to go. In this scenario, you are the large magnet that barely notices they exist. They deserve better.

When we want to encounter other magnets that are just right for us, we need to have a clear magnetic field, we want to make sure they know that our magnetic power equals theirs.

That’s how we come to a sense of recognition.

What the hell do you do with all this energy?

Okay, so imagine we have cleared our energy. Wow. What a high.

This is where we head back out there into the world in full force, careful not to pick up more coins and shitty magnets. We have that power to go out there heart open, mind open, with super-charged dreams. This can attract anything you want.

Let’s be clear, sometimes we’re not looking to attract anything at all, we just want to enjoy feeling our own super-charged power.

This energy cleanse is fantastic even when we want to feel great on our own.

The more we have let go of, the more powerful we are, the wider our reach.

In this very special super-charged place is where you can find love, and not just any love, healthy love.

Can you imagine catching love at full power?

A month ago, I stepped out on the streets of London (in a non-prostitute kind of way) after having undergone an energy and people cleanse and opened my magnetic field in search of matching ones. I was searching for kindred souls, for love, for friendships, for work.

I cannot tell you about all the exceptional people that have come into my life since that moment, but I will tell you a little bit about Him, since we are talking about love a lot on this blog.

I felt his magnetic field when we were on the opposite sides of the city, when we were still just words on a phone. I felt it strong and clear.

He was not expecting me. I thought it was impossible to meet someone like him but it happened: his magnetic field has invaded mine with the strength of an ocean.

He has inspired me to write, he excites my very being. I found a matching magnet. I admire his power knowing full well that mine is equally as strong. Our energies have different colors, and the beauty of these strong flows coming together is somewhat magical.

Who knows where this new magnetic connection is headed, all I know is that for the first time in a long time I am free to be me, excited, bubbly, full of ideas, a little crazy. I am connected deeply to another being, I am happy.

Maybe the universe put me in place to cross this magical energy to remind me that something exceptional is out there, that there are multiple other magnets that match our own power our there, or maybe this specific one is the energy I decide I want and need for life. Who knows, we are still just dipping our toes in a universe of unknown.

Love, so passionate, so strong, so complex.

Yet in this universe of complexity it was as simple as could be, he knew it was me, I knew it was him.

Two souls cross paths. It’s a bit like magic if you think about it.

Amongst millions of wandering hearts, you catch theirs and they catch yours.

There is such purity in that feeling of being home right here right now, in the middle of a street, at a stoplight, in the eyes of a stranger.

You can feel that power anywhere you are, in that coffee place you’ve never walked into before, or mid morning run, or in your co-working space or within a glance, across the bar, on a night out with your best friends.

You never know where love is going to catch you.

Let’s build the best chapter of our lives yet

Make no mistake, to attract anything worth having, the first step is to get rid of what’s weighing you down. I challenge you to write down anything that is currently draining your energy, to thank it for the role it has played in your life and to let go of it.

You don’t need to let go of everything of course, sometimes you need to hold on tight to what has been amazing.

Take a moment to thank all the wonderful people who have walked by your side thus far and who will be walking alongside you in what’s to come. Don’t ever take them for granted.

I challenge us all to restore our energy to factory settings, to surround ourselves with the right crew and who knows, maybe find love.

Let’s see what happens, when we unleash our full magnetic field.

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This post was previously published on medium.com.

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