Quick phrase! misused by youth, negotiated by peers, analyzed by researchers, still debatable. Ironically it’s not possible one day you are in love, which is blind(WOW), next day you restored your eyesight to claim to your partner “Sorry, I don’t love you anymore”. That’s funny. Kudos to our comprehension of Love! Eye catching wisdom is the culprit. It makes things complicated when actually they are not.
Love is too simple to comprehend. We disregard when LOVE is there, look for it where we don’t have it.
. . .
Let’s have a tour to valley of Love:
Origin:
Rush of feelings unnamed yet. You can perceive it, when you feel it.
Cause:
A process of ‘Give and Take’ of anything materially, physically, spiritually, emotionally, either abstract or concrete! between two individuals.
Physicality:
A ritual of feelings, you perform, is Love.
Progression:
Oxytocin, dopamine and serotonin associated with happiness may come through attraction, attachment even by enjoying a cup of coffee while sitting in the balcony of your apartment. Is there any relation of these hormones to Love? Yes or No! both are correct. Love gives you solace, the spirit to live through. It’s not always a happy emotion to stay within love. It’s related with happiness in time of grief and sorrows. It’s crude but purified. All the happy hormones are associated with love, not through their kind of hormonal way, rather through a sensational way. Love itself is ‘hormone of soul of pleasure’.
Domain:
Love is natural. Love is universal. It resides inside you. You may be in love with your best friend, your step mother, your spouse, your caring sibling, your ex or the whole humanity at once.
. . .
How to know you *really* are in love:
Poor Love! misunderstood! misinterpreted! malnourished! in this era of matter and lust. Blurred vision can be cleared if we flourish our wisdom in soil of maturity. Sure signs you are in Love, are following:
#1 Pain is mutual:
You may feel someone else’s pain, that’s sympathy for others. If you feel the exact intensity of pain, you have empathy. Two absolute traits of humanity! everyone must have! Niche of love is different. Here the pain is yours. You are dealing with the pain, or at least you know you have to deal with the pain. It’s not the other one’s, it’s yours! all alone yours!. Without doubt of a single penny, you own the pain of your beloved inside your subconscious. Somewhere more than sympathy and empathy, that’s here love resides inside you.
#2 Desire for the companionship is overwhelming without an obvious reason:
You may want to hangout with your childhood friend because you enjoy intellectual jokes, he cracks all the time! You are being self obsessed. You may want to spend weekend with your girlfriend as she is freaking hot! that’s attraction. You may want to go for shopping with your next door neighbor as you are under confident about your choices! that’s insecurity. You may want your boyfriend close enough as you are always fantasizing about him! that’s infatuation. You are sad as your roommate is on vacation with his/her family! that’s attachment.
Is there any trace of existing love when you desire for the companionship? Yes! when desire is without any obvious reason. It’s intense but gentle. Eating you from the inside, molding you into SOMEONE NEW. An obsession in it’s own control. You crave for it by your heart but brain handles the whole process. You desire for it until your beloved is with you OR you are the NEW YOU! Both consequences are cheerful. It’s never ever painful to desire for someone you love truly. It’s a whole process of comfort and solace.
#3 Expired ‘expiry date’:
An absolute myth marker is ‘expiry date of emotion! you interpret as love’. ‘I don’t love you anymore.’ nullified here. Attraction fades when eyes are turned off. Infatuation expires as you spend time with person you are infatuated to. Attachment can go away with a little sprinkle of ego. Evergreen Love! does never expire. It may be hurdled, blurred, confused or misunderstood. It’s there when you negate it yourself. People DIE believing the myth ‘they hate their beloved ones’. when, in fact they were following their ego. Love! developed once is always there. Whether you accept it or not. It grows on it’s own shoulders with strong regenerative capacity.
#4 Fear of losing your beloved makes you closer to reality:
‘I can’t live without you’ associated with love, is a bullshit. Love is never going to imprison your life on the basis of sole companionship. Living miles away, it gets more stronger. Love is not dream of a princess who always grasps the ideal. You love that person means you love the feel of that person. You don’t love any physical entity. You love an AURA where beloved is that person. You have to gather up yourself after a breakup when you are not in love. Your breakup gathers you up when it’s Love. It heals everything with it’s deep breath. It gives you an ultimate strength named ‘welcome to reality’. It’s itself a definite route to reality. Fantasy, idealization dies inside the premises of Love.
Next time don’t get bothered by the phrase ‘I don’t love you anymore’. Because he/she had never loved you before.
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This post was previously published on Hello, Love.
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Photo credit: Unsplash
