The dating world is treacherous!
I hear dating stories occasionally and sometimes I am so grateful that I don’t have to deal with it. And as annoying as this may be to hear for single people, it’s not your fault — unfortunately it’s just the society we live in today.
But that doesn’t mean you’re perfect.
We can always improve ourselves and we all need to take some form of accountability that we are not the best versions of ourselves and are a bad memory for certain people.
Yes, dating is hard, but don’t make it harder for yourself.
Make Sure You’re Appreciated
A lot of people these days are on their journey to do for themselves, be selfish because the world doesn’t care about them, bla bla bla.
Honestly, I haven’t met so many people who are self-centred and want it all to be about them. This is the society we’re dealing with now.
And with that being said, you’re going to bump into people who are willing to take from you more than they’re going to give.
You won’t make someone love you by giving them more than they don’t already appreciate.
If They Ghost You, Respect the Dead
People will do what they want in this life.
If they want to talk to you — they will. If they want to see you — they will. If they want to buy you your favourite cakes — they will.
When people don’t want to do these things for you, they will ghost you and leave your life without saying a word.
Respect the dead and move on.
In the same way, they gave you no respect and moved on.
You Want Mature Love
Not immature love.
Mature love is energizing, whereas immature love is exhausting.
Of course, every relationship is going to have its ups and downs, but if you’re having more downs than you’re having ups — it’s time to re-evaluate the situation.
Mature love is about respect, growth, and understanding.
Immature love is draining, toxic and painful.
Sort Yourself Out
How do you expect to have a good relationship with someone else when you have a toxic relationship with yourself?
Rather than going through life and searching for the ‘right’ person, you also need to become the ‘right’ person for somebody else.
With this, you’ll start to see where in some cases you are the problem and have probably lost good people because of your character.
Chasing Looks Desperate
If you want to make someone run as far as they can from you, chase them right?
When you are chasing someone in the dating phase because you like them so much, high chances you’re probably freaking the other person out.
This is not always true — some people like to be chased and it works out.
But if the energy is not reciprocated — you’re just going to end up looking desperate and a liability in the person’s eyes.
Stop rushing into relationships — let it happen organically.
Enjoy Your Own Company
The last thing anybody wants is to end up with a person who doesn’t know how to be happy alone and is clingy and attached to you to ensure that they are happy.
Don’t expect anybody else to make you happy. You are responsible for your happiness.
Your partner is not your parent, therapist, or pet — they have their own lives!
Happy Dating!
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This post was previously published on medium.com.
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From The Good Men Project on Medium
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Photo credit: Karsten Winegeart on Unsplash
