Why dating apps lead to lower divorce rates? Here is the success of online dating!
Recently, I read an article about dating apps. What draws my attention is in the United States, about 40% of singles met their most recent date online. With the proliferation of dating apps and websites, meeting romantic partners online has become increasingly common. However, people who meet romantic partners online may be prone to two kinds of mistakes: scheduling too many dates at once and focusing on reasons why a match won’t work out rather than why it might.
When using dating apps, it is easy to end up with many matches and potential dates. However, studies show people can only process a limited number of choices simultaneously. The human brain has limitations in how much information it can handle at once. While the brain is intricate, most people cannot adequately evaluate more than 5 to 9 options at a time. If faced with more choices, the brain will tend to go on autopilot. Therefore, after matching with or messaging nine or so people, stop using the apps or dating websites. Instead, choose to get to know one person better. Spending more time getting to know someone leads to a higher likelihood of developing a real connection.
A second common mistake is to focus on why a match would not work out rather than why it might.
Human brains have a tendency towards “negative bias”. People tend to pay more attention to and weigh negative information more heavily than positive information. When it comes to a date, it is easy for a person to notice differences and incompatibilities. However, for a match to succeed, it is important to also detect and focus on the positive. For example, those common interests, values, experiences, attractions, and more. Try to look for reasons to say ‘yes’ to a second date rather than reasons to say ‘no’ can definitely help build a healthier relationship!
Using dating apps may introduce some challenges. However, surprisingly research finds that couples who meet through online dating don’t actually have a higher divorce rate than those who meet offline! It is explained that people who date online are more likely to have full-time jobs, and higher levels of education, and are looking for committed relationships nowadays. Proactiveness and a sense of purpose play a large role in who people date and have a higher chance to marry ultimately.
Moreover, dating apps expand the pool of potential partners, making it more likely to find someone with mutual interests, values, and goals. With some self-awareness of the potential downsides, dating apps can be a pathway to healthy, long-term relationships.
At the end of the day, attraction and relationships are complex. Biology, psychology, experiences, and environment are all involved. Mutual lust and romance are important for attraction and getting a relationship off the ground, but a long-term commitment is built on deep multifaceted compatibility. Lasting love takes conscious effort, not just passion. So enjoy the possibilities of online dating, but also look for real compatibility and be willing to work at building something meaningful.
With self-awareness and meeting the right person, technology-assisted dating can lead to amazing relationships. While apps make dating more convenient, invest in getting to know someone for who they really are — not just how they look on a screen. With empathy, honesty, and commitment, tech-fueled dating can actually yield relationships to last a lifetime!
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This post was previously published on MEDIUM.COM
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