My cat is worth more than your six kids (?)
Few of us would ever stop to think we should not kill, or eat animals, but that is a human conceit, evolved from our sociology and values, not from our planet.
There are some world faiths that still hold reverence for animals, and indeed for all life. But these are few and far between.
A long time ago, we met a neighbor who loved his place and nature and much as we love it too. But, he immediately began to talk about how protecting and defending it was all for “my kids.” He waxed philosophically about it for awhile, never shying from the intensity of feeling he had for “the next generation of my family.”
Now, for us, a couple who desperately wanted children, but instead had infertility, illness, tumors, endometriosis, surgeries, costly IVF, and miscarriages, this felt a bit awkward. Of course we did not mention our heartache.
Instead, I was ready to tell him how much we adore our kitty cat, but was distracted. A few of his children ran over, and somehow, he ended up talking about formerly working at a slaughter house and even hunting in the winter to feed his family.
Love is love, but it’s more complex than that when animals leap into the picture. To each and every one of us, the life of our very beloved family member is worth more to us personally than children of strangers we will never meet.
We have had to care for both sick and dying parents, as well as sick, injured, and dying pets. And, although different, it is very clear that love for the animals is just as potent a force as love for human family. The grief is even more intense for some people when they lose a pet. The feelings involved are complex. That too, makes them meaningful.
There is an entire psychology field to be built around this topic.
It struck me that most of us are sociology and biologically wired to love our children and put them above all else, but when you can’t have children, it is a safe bet that you will be crazy about your pets, and indeed, all animals. And all living creatures.
Even the living rocks get more credit when you don’t have kids. You can realize the sacred wonder of existing at all.
All creatures great and small
All creatures great and small, matter, even when they don’t matter to us.
Our culture is actually very destructive towards the rest of the living world. Our selfishness about having kids is baked into the script. We even clash about whether politicians should shoot their pets, or poison them with toxins and rat poison in crowded New York city rentals. We fight about veganism, and always find our views “the righteous ones.” We conflict about animal testing, and animal rights.
It’s right that we should think about all of this.
Part of the problem is that having kids is quite often presented as a choice. It is not a free choice. There are accidents. There is infertility. There is cultural censure about roles. There is even forced birth in some places, now. If choice were truly free and open, our world and our relationships with the connected world would be very different, indeed.
Will AI bots care for us, and we for them? I truly hope not.
Do you love your son or daughter, spouse, or friend more than you love your pet? Most people would say they do. It is definitely expected.
However, as our culture fragments, and alienation, even extinction of other animals happens, I think this is likely to change. An elderly person will always love his/her pet as much as they once loved those humans they have lost. A lonely man or homeless woman may spend 24 hours per day with their puppy, or kitty cat. They have every right, and every inclination to not be as vulnerable with other people.
People who have had much loss will also center their whole lives around those four legs, (or sometimes two or more legged) that fill their hearts. Human heartbreak is different than the kind our pets leave us with. However, it can, and should be, very, very powerful.
Sometimes a rich person dies and leaves their entire estate to their beloved dog. Some people are outraged that maybe “That’s ten million dollars that could have helped other people is being spent on some pampered poodle!”
However, that is not what is happening at all. The person who loved her — Let’s say Lassie — invested that money in peace of mind in hopes Lassie would be cared for. The wealthy, perhaps if they are too be criticized, should be criticized for not giving more of their earthly share when he or she was alive.
Let’s not put our scorn on the poor, grief-stricken animal!
Human beings are quick to judge
While we are quick to judge people who spoil their pets, we are also more likely to be judgmental of others for being of a different religion, color, culture, LGBTQ+, or even younger, or older.
Animals do not judge us this way. Maybe they are superior, in this.
Human beings prefer to believe we have a supremacy. We are told to feel that we are smarter, greater, more industrious, chosen by God, or whatever.
Animals make us vulnerable in very different ways than people do. Not only are they less judgmental, they are more innocent.
In comparing love of one another within, or to, other species, we are not comparing apples and oranges. It is more as if we are comparing the force of gravity with the mystery of God.
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This post was previously published on medium.com.
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From The Good Men Project on Medium
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Photo credit: Jonas Vincent on Unsplash
