Nobody Knows When the Last Goodbye Is…

The thing about goodbyes is, they rarely feel like goodbyes when they happen. They’re quieter than you expect. Sometimes they don’t even sound like goodbyes.

Nobody ever thinks that this is the last time. Because if we did, we wouldn’t just hug tighter. We would stay. We would cancel the meeting. We would miss the train. We would stand in the rain until our shoes get drenched, our skin shivers, and our coffee turns cold in our hands to make the moment last a little longer.

But that’s the trick life plays on us. It lets us think there’s always more time.

There will be more calls, more walks, and more lazy Sunday afternoons when nothing important gets said, but everything important is felt.

Nobody knows when the last laugh happens between two people.
Or the last inside joke. Or the last fight. Or the last time you roll your eyes at them and they roll theirs right back, both pretending to be annoyed when you are just happy that they are still around.

The last goodbye might not even be a real goodbye. It might just be you, waving absently while pulling your suitcase out of a cab, too distracted to notice how they watched you leave.

And sometimes, the last goodbye happens with words left unsaid. Not because we didn’t care. But because we thought we had more time to say them.

So we wait. We wait for a better day. For the right words. For less awkwardness. We wait for the next time. Not knowing that next time isn’t always promised.

The older you get, the more you understand that people leave without warning. Friends drift. Families fracture, Lovers move to different cities, and swear they’ll stay in touch until one day you realize you don’t even know their new address. And sometimes, the people who leave don’t mean to. They just can’t stay, and certainly not in the way you hoped.

Nobody knows when the last goodbye is. And maybe that’s a kindness.
Maybe if we knew, we would crumble under the weight of it. Maybe life is merciful that way, giving us one more smile, one more joke, one more evening where we think we have forever.

But still. If you’re lucky enough to be standing in front of someone you love today, please hug them tighter. Listen better. Laugh louder. Say the messy, clumsy, embarrassing things you’re afraid to say. Tell them they matter.
Tell them you’re grateful. Tell them you’re sorry. Tell them you love them.

Day 102

Home, Rohini

~ A

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This post was previously published on medium.com.

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