How To Protect Teenage Girls At School

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So currently there seems to be this culture, whereby teenage girls are being told that “boys will be boys” and that they more or less have to accept the prevailing, misogynistic rape culture in school, including receiving threats via social media such as Facebook messages and Instagram posts, as well as face-to-face. How can this be resisted and a safer environment created for female student.

I feel any serious response by schools to address this issue should take into account THREE main issues – the existing law, the school’s mission statement and ethos and the development of the PTA into a networking group for working mothers.

First, the law – what is it? Laws about the age of consent and related matters vary from country to country and even within countries. In the USA, what is the law at the local, state or federal level? As a British citizen, I can’t answer that; but, as an example, I can give you the law as it stands in England and Wales –

1/ The age of consent for males for heterosexual sex is ANY AGE, any time, with anybody, anywhere.

2/ All sexual contact for persons of either sex is FORBIDDEN from birth until the day before one’s 14^th. birthday. A person is considered to be invincibly ignorant of sex during that time. As such, the law considers these people to be incapable of giving consent. The law decides for them and the law’s decision is NO.

3/ From a person’s 14^th birthday to the day before one’s 16^th birthday, all sexual contact remains FORBIDDEN; however, the law now considers these people to be able to have knowledge of what sex is, their rights and responsibilities and to be able to give consent. Therefore, all requests for consent should be answered NO. Anybody who answers YES is breaking the law and thus, if brought before a court of law, will face juvenile penalties.

4/ The age of consent for females for heterosexual sex is 16. She can now say YES without penalty.

5/ Heterosexual couples can marry with their parents’ permission at 16 (hence the female age of consent at the same age).

6/ Heterosexual couples can marry at 17 without their parents’ permission if they travel to the village of Gretna Green in Scotland (but nowhere else) and get married there.

7/ At 18, heterosexual couples can marry without their parents’ permission anywhere.

8/ At 18 is the homosexual age of consent for men.

9/ At 18 homosexual couples can create a civil partnership (“gay marriage”).

10/ Lesbianism is always legal at ANY AGE for females, as established by Queen Victoria.

Hmmm! This hodgepodge of British legislation creates, on a practical level, some interesting situations for British teenagers –

1/ Teenage girls can explore each other sexually any time they want.

2/ Any teenage girl under 14 who actually DOES want sex will be 100% protected by the law if she approaches a male of any age to get it, knowing full well that the male will get 100% of the blame (because he always has the ability to consent) if there is any trouble and she will get zero. She will win every court case without fail. Legally, she is absolutely invincible. So the male she chooses HAD BETTER SHUT UP AND TAKE IT.

3/ However, the situation reverses at 14 – a teenage girl who is 15 but lies to her boyfriend, saying she is 16 to get sex from him, has broken the law but he hasn’t, so she will face penalties but he walks free.

So any school wishing to combat rape culture must, as a baseline measure, examine existing legislation and think about what it means on a practical level for their teens, for the area in which it is located in order to provide a cogent response. In particular, these legislative requirements must be reflected in any sex education curriculum, so that sex ed is both age-appropriate and actually able to be carried out by teens who want to follow such advice, without the law getting in the way.

Second, the school’s mission statement and ethos – all schools should revise these to be inclusive of all genders and sexualities, reflective of current feminist trains of thought and every effort made to purge any old-fashioned, sexist attitudes about dress code, and disciplinary procedures, such as sending girls home for “distracting” attire, should be abolished. Specific documents condemning rape culture should be drawn up and circulated among the whole school community (teachers, managers, students, staff and parents). These documents should consist of a series of belief statements, where participants draw an X on a line from 1 (“disagree strongly” to 5 (“agree strongly”). Results should be published and the mission statement updated to reflect these.

It may occur that schools located in very conservative areas of the country may disagree with many of the proposed changes. In this case, schools have two possible avenues – first, they have to see whether parental attitudes actually reflect the law. If not, the school has every right to enforce change without parental approval, especially if it’s a Government-run facility. If things are not so bad and there is some broad agreement with the law but little enthusiasm, then the third issue comes into play.

Third, there must be an immediate and dramatic upgrade of the Parent-Teacher Association, where both parents and teachers are encouraged to take courses on how to combat rape culture and raise awareness of teen sexuality, date rape and other similar issues. Funding from feminist organisations could help here. In particular, schools should set up a proper networking group for working mothers, who can help each other out finding jobs, setting up female-led business initiatives and women-run entrepreneurial projects (if you want to defeat the patriarchy, punch them in the wallet). This would then open up job opportunities for their teenage daughters, who could then also join. This would create a financially-dominant female body, which could then contribute to school funding, making contributions for new equipment and other ventures, creating business connections with the wider community, encouraging the school to continue supporting women and girls in order to continue to receive the benefits and raising its profile in the local community.

The school would then be in a position to get tough. Fathers and sons of a woman-hating, misogynistic bent, resistant to the changes, would be either forced to accept the changes or else remove their sons from the school. This decisive action would then galvanise further numbers of working mothers, who would then be encouraged to send their daughters to the school, knowing that it would now be safer.

The school would remain co-ed all the time; however, families who bring up their sons to show respect towards women would, of course, always be welcome, as well as a wide range of LGBT students who would diversify the student body.

In this way, it is hoped a more inclusive, female-friendly atmosphere can be created and rape culture removed from the lives of teenage girls across the globe.

Oliver Chapman, DipCPC, PT

Certified Life Coach

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This post is published here with permission from the author.

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