There is a poem that goes:
“Life gave us beautiful youth, but I loved the wrong person, leaving it covered in dust. If given another chance, I will definitely open my eyes wide, even with many promises of love, I will see your true face clearly.”
In just a few words, it expresses the voice of loving the wrong person. After loving the wrong person, not only did you invest in the wrong relationship, but you also wasted your youth.
Looking back, what remains is more regret and dissatisfaction.
There is also a saying:
“Men fear choosing the wrong profession, women fear marrying the wrong man.”
In fact, whether it’s a man or a woman, falling in love with the right person is especially important.
But people can be deceiving, and you never know if the person saying “I love you” in front of you truly means it.
Some people are after money, some are after appearance, and some are after both, leaving us with less and less sense of security.
Nowadays, online chatting has become a window for young people to communicate. If you suspect that someone may not love you as much, you can review your chat history with them.
The speed of responding to your messages
People always prioritize their tasks, putting the most important things first.
If you send a message to someone and they take a long time to reply, it means that you are not a priority to them.
Someone who truly cares about you would not put you at the bottom of their list, indicating that you are not important to them.
Some time ago, my boyfriend replied to my messages very slowly. He didn’t respond to my morning message until late at night, insisting on video calling me just before going to sleep.
During the video call, he could barely keep his eyes open due to fatigue, and when I asked him what he did during the day, he mumbled and his words were unclear.
At that time, I thought he might just be too busy at the moment, which is why he acted that way.
I didn’t expect that he would stop replying to my messages, taking many days to respond after I sent them.
Every time I asked him why he was like that, he always said, “Very busy!”
Later, I realized that he had already changed his mind. I had loved the wrong person. It was just that my intelligence was zero when I deeply loved someone. Clearly, I knew it was during the epidemic, and he wasn’t working at all, yet I still believed his lies.
Someone who truly cares about you would not make you wait for a long time and would want to reply to your messages as soon as they see them.
Someone who puts you at the bottom of their list does not consider you important, to the point of being worthless.
If you encounter such a person, you should know to leave in time to avoid causing even greater harm.
Initiating conversations with you frequently
A host once said:
“The person who truly loves you cares a lot and has a lot to say to you.”
If someone frequently initiates conversations with you, without a doubt, you are very important to that person.
A friend told me:
“My boyfriend never initiates conversations with me. It’s always me who has to initiate the conversation and video calls with him.”
To that, I say:
“Girl, aren’t you tired?”
A man who only waits for you to initiate, never taking the initiative himself, does not truly care about you.
If a man is interested in a woman, he will actively pursue her. If a man truly cares about a woman, he will also actively message her.
Although gender equality is advocated now, women still need to make men pay more attention to them.
A man who doesn’t even initiate messages to you, how can you expect him to take care of you when you are together?
If someone makes you initiate the conversation all the time without taking the initiative themselves, it’s like someone always making you give without ever taking a step themselves. It’s best to leave such a person early.
Sometimes, knowing when to leave can prevent further mistakes and bring timely joy.
Never giving perfunctory replies
Every time I chat with my mom, she always says a lot, and I always complain:
“You’re so annoying, you talk a lot but it’s all useless chit-chat, not getting to the point.”
But on second thought, my mom sees us as very important, which is why she nags like that.
Someone who truly cares about you, just like your own family, will never give perfunctory replies online.
Because they love you, they understand your feelings. They know that if they perfunctorily reply to you, it will hurt you, so they won’t do it.
Someone who truly cares about you always wants to say more to you, even if it’s just a little bit of concern, even if it’s a casual greeting, it means a lot to both of you.
Sometimes, I like to make excuses for the person I love, always convincing myself that “the other person is very indifferent when replying to you because they are very busy.”
Don’t deceive yourself anymore. If someone can perfunctorily reply to you, it means they don’t really care about you.
And don’t think that someone who usually talks a lot to you is just verbose. It’s because they care, that’s why they talk a lot.
I used to want to find someone I love and spend my life with them, but later I realized how important it is to find someone who loves me.
Only someone who loves you will care about you, accommodate you in many ways, and make you happy.
If the person you love is slow to reply to your messages online, never initiates conversations with you, and always gives perfunctory replies during conversations, without a doubt, this person doesn’t care about you. You need to wake up in time to avoid lifelong regrets.
Years later, you will realize that some people are not worth it.
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This post was previously published on medium.com.
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From The Good Men Project on Medium
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Photo credit: Jennifer Marquez on Unsplash
