It’s the delusion of hope that draws you back for more. You haven’t moved on from them yet because of this.
You’re hoping that things will improve even though they haven’t approached you and you haven’t created a committed relationship.
That this individual will decide they want to be with you when they wake up one morning. That all you’ve worked for in creating your agreement with them will be worthwhile.
That you’ll finally have the happily ever after you’ve been longing for. The erroneous optimism is the cause of your failure to date anyone else. You wanted to avoid taking the chance of moving on in case you almost decided they wanted you as well.
Nothing has changed between you, but you want to keep the opportunity for things to turn around. Because you’ve been giving this individual your heart, no one else has had the chance to win you over.
Although you are technically single, you might as well declare yourself taken because you have no interest in dating anybody else.
You’ve cut off communication with the outside world. False hope is the hardest thing about almost all relationships. They flirt with you so much, yet you would go on if you knew they didn’t feel the same way.
You could converse for hours on end, but if you sensed your personalities weren’t compatible, you would go on. You would go if you thought you had no chance, but they keep offering you more and more excuses to stay.
You allow them to continue playing you because you believe that if you wait long enough, they will eventually become yours. You two make sense together, after all. You two would be an excellent fit.
It will take a little while for that to become evident if you can’t see it very immediately. You stay because of this, despite the fact that they don’t always treat you fairly.
Your delusion of hope has led you to compromise your morals. You’ve been duped into believing that you will eventually receive better treatment from them. They will eventually see what they have been missing. They will treat you rotten one day. However, what about right now?
You don’t need them if they aren’t treating you with the respect you deserve at the moment. Why do you desire them so much if they are making you feel lost, uneasy, and uncertain?
Who wouldn’t you want to date if they made you feel strong, attractive, and intelligent? When they finally text you back, wouldn’t it be nicer to feel supported every single moment of the day rather than once every few weeks? False hope is the hardest thing in any almost relationship.
It’s always tricky to know when to give up and when to give them a little more time. You never know if your assessment of their sentiments for you is accurate or if you’re just deluding yourself.
You never know when to give up on flirting altogether because you deserve more.
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As always, thank you for reading!
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This post was previously published on medium.com.
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From The Good Men Project on Medium
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Photo credit: Jan Tinneberg on Unsplash
