The Loneliness That Comes With Becoming Yourself

Do you also feel lonely on your healing journey? Do you feel the odd one out in a room full of “friends”? You feel unfamiliar among so many familiar faces… I know this feeling, and I’m at a point where I’ve embraced this feeling, maybe way too much, according to many.

But I feel it’s the most beautiful feeling ever. To love you in the silences and noises. I’ve seen posts where people expressed how depressing this healing journey can feel, and I could feel every word because I was in that place once.

What’s the point of having so many friends who aren’t there for you but for themselves? Those who don’t understand your pain but dismiss or minimise it, who couldn’t care less about your feelings.

So why would you bother to keep such friends in your life?

When you let such people go from your life, you give space to the people who are meant to come into your life to make you feel seen, heard, and acknowledged.

Even if nobody comes right away, you are there for yourself, far better than the so-called friends.

I feel this agitation and desperation comes from the narrative that we are social animals and we need to have a lot of people in our lives. I don’t find it to be true. At least not in our case. Not for people like us who are too busy to find the intricacies of life. Who let others’ emotions get into their heart and cry because someone else’s childhood wasn’t happy? It’s not for people like us when we say we are there for someone; we truly are; we will do anything in our power to be there and hold them.

We’re not here to make socialising our priority anyway; we’re here to feel all the emotions as much as possible, dissect and understand them on a different level, and get close to our truth as much as possible.

So it’s normal that we will be stripped of everything that distracts us from finding who we are. I know it feels terrible at times. I also know it’s okay to feel terrible sometimes; it’s okay to not have friends.

It’s okay to be lost in life, and it’s okay to start from scratch. It’s okay to be lonely. Loneliness will push you towards the inner world you’re meant to explore, my dear.

If you talk all the time and never stay silent, how will you see the dialogue you’re having with yourself? In the same way, those time of solitude helps you to see yourself from a different perspective, from a deeper layer, that you’re here to discover.

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This post was previously published on medium.com.