“Happiness is a journey, not a destination.” — Gaur Gopal Das
Two weeks ago, I witnessed a very bad fight between my friends, Jane and Gerald. I knew they were either going to call it quits or at least take a break from their relationship.
Imagine my shock when I saw them last weekend all lovey-dovey and back to the happy couple that we all know them to be.
Gerald was actually the inspiration for this story.
You see, Jane and Gerald have been together 14 years and they are the happiest couple I know. They were high school sweethearts and their relationship has survived storms and hurricanes.
They swear by the three pillars of happiness as being the solid rock foundation upon which they have built their relationship.
They know that no matter how big the fight is, they have built their relationship in a way that allows them to fight through things instead of sweeping them under the rug until they become worse problems than they are.
Have you ever wondered what the secret to a happy and lasting relationship is? While there is no one answer that fits all couples, there are three key pillars that are essential for happiness in relationships.
A happy and lasting relationship is built on a foundation of three pillars: communication, trust, and compromise.
Without these key ingredients, relationships are more likely to crumble under the weight of misunderstandings and resentment.
Here Are The Three Pillars of Happiness in Relationships
Pillar One: Trust
I have written about this one before:
Trust is even more important than love in a relationship and that article elaborated why I believe it to be so.
Trust is one of the most important ingredients in any relationship.
It helps to build a sense of closeness and intimacy, and it gives us the confidence to express our true selves.
Without trust, we would always be guarded and on edge, always wondering what the other person is thinking or feeling.
Trust also allows us to take risks, both emotionally and physically.
It is knowing that we can rely on the other person to be there for us, no matter what.
That is why trust is so important in any relationship — without it, we would simply be going through the motions, never truly knowing or understanding each other.
Jane says she trusts Gerald completely. With all her heart and soul and all her possessions.
From my own observations with all my relationships, platonic or romantic, trust is the foundation that all healthy relationships are built on.
Without trust, it will be difficult to feel secure and confident in your relationship.
Therefore, it is important to work on building trust by being honest and transparent with your partner. If you make a mistake, own up to it and apologize.
Over time, this will help create a sense of mutual respect and understanding. And most importantly, it will increase and consolidate your emotions of happiness in the relationship.
Pillar Two: Communication
“Communication is the lifeline of any relationship. Without it, the relationship will starve itself to death.” — Elizabeth Bourgeret
One of the most important things in any relationship is communication.
It may seem like a no-brainer, but so many couples struggle with effective communication.
In order to avoid misunderstandings and hurt feelings, it is essential to be clear and concise when communicating with your partner.
For Jane and Gerald, this means being honest about their thoughts and feelings and being open to listening to their partner’s perspective. They quickly realized that when they both feel heard and respected, it made it easier to work through conflicts and build a stronger bond.
Open and honest communication is essential for building trust, which is the first pillar of happiness in relationships. I believe trust is the foundation of any relationship. Without trust, it’s difficult to feel safe and secure.
When there is trust in a relationship, it makes it easier to openly and honestly communicate.
It allows you to share your thoughts, feelings and needs with your partner. It also gives them the opportunity to do the same.
When you’re able to openly communicate with each other, you can work together to resolve conflict and build a stronger relationship.
Trust is essential for feeling safe and secure in any relationship. Open and honest communication is the key to building that trust.
Pillar Three: Compromise
“Compromise is what binds people together. Compromise is sharing and conciliatory, it is loving and kind and unselfish.” ― Ali Harris, The First Last Kiss.
Last but not least, compromise is key in any relationship.
My friend Alanah thinks when you compromise, it is an indication of a lack of self-respect and confidence. On the contrary, I think self-respecting confident people are big on strategic compromise in their relationships.
No two people are ever going to agree on everything 100% of the time. It’s just a fact of life. That’s why compromise is such an important part of any relationship.
When it comes to relationships, in order to maintain a healthy balance, both partners need to be willing to give and take. This means occasionally sacrificing your own wants or needs for the sake of your relationship.
Whether you’re married, dating, or just friends, there will always be times when you have to meet in the middle and find a way to see eye-to-eye.
It’s not always easy, but it’s worth it.
Because at the end of the day, relationships are all about finding common ground and learning to love each other for who you are — not who you think the other person should be.
However, it is important to remember that you should never compromise your personal values or boundaries.
If you do find yourself in a situation where you are feeling pressured to do so, be sure to communicate this with your partner in an assertive but respectful way.
So next time you’re faced with a disagreement, remember that compromise is the key to keeping your relationship strong.
Final Thoughts
The three pillars of happiness in relationships are communication, trust, and compromise.
By prioritizing these key areas, you can create a strong foundation for a happy and lasting relationship with your partner or your friends.
Trust is the foundation of any relationship, and without it, couples are more likely to fall into patterns of suspicion and mistrust.
Communication is essential for keeping the lines of communication open and ensuring that each person feels heard and understood.
Compromise is also essential for maintaining a healthy relationship; without it, partners are likely to feel devalued and unappreciated.
When all three of these pillars are in place, relationships are more likely to stand the test of time.
Jane and Gerald shared that in addition to keeping the three pillars of happiness at the cornerstone of their relationship, they also always make sure to take the time to appreciate each other and show their love for one another. Whether it’s taking a romantic walk on the beach or cooking dinner together, they always find ways to express their love for one another.
And that, my friends, is the key to a long and happy relationship!
And Now Your Thoughts…
Please let me know your thoughts in the comments section!
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This post was previously published on MEDIUM.COM.
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