Your coworker. Your parents. Your significant other. Any of these people can be a narcissist. It’s a word you’ve probably heard for quite a while, but you may not know what it is, and why this means that they don’t care about you.
A person with narcissism seems to care about no one but themselves and has no remorse for anyone else. Why does this happen? Why is dealing with them such a problem? Let’s find out.
A Narcissist is Entitled and Self-Important
Everyone can be a little selfish at times. Even if you are an empathetic person, there’s times when you need to take care of yourself.
However, a narcissist is someone who always is entitled and believes they are important. When you’re dealing with a narcissist, you’re dealing with someone who always believes they’re the center of attention, and any deviation from that is a personal attack on them.
Have you ever dealt with someone who flips when someone else is getting attention? They may be a narcissist.
They Love to Exaggerate, a Lot
A person with a narcissist personality doesn’t just stretch the truth a little. In their head, everything is a grand accomplishment.
For example, they may claim they got into a fight and won, and the people around them clapped. A narcissist may say that celebrities come visit them in the hospital, or that they’ve been with more women than are on earth.
Sometimes, a narcissist can take a talent or event that happened to them that was true, but they exaggerate it so much it might as well be a lie.
Someone who stretches the truth a little to make a good impression isn’t necessarily a narcissist. All of us can have warped perceptions on what has happened. However, a narcissist can never tell a boring story.
They Don’t Care About You
Some people can be self-centered, but still have empathy. However, a narcissist does not love you. They will only want to associate with people who they believe are on their level. A narcissist will not care about the feelings of anyone, especially if you’re below them.
You may wonder, “then why do I feel like I’m married to one?” This is because a narcissist will pretend to love people, but it’s for their own game. They may use you for money, sex, or just to have a companion.
They Need the Best in Everything
A narcissist always wants to have the best computer, car, office, house, the list goes on. While everyone wants that to a degree, we settle on what we can afford. A narcissist, meanwhile, may put themselves in to massive debt to get the best, or use people in any way they can to get the best. In a market where there’s always a better item coming out, this can be even more of a damage to one’s finances.
They Can Be Self-Destructive
When one thinks of a narcissist, they may imagine a person in power. This is someone who doesn’t seem to be brought down by anything.
While these people do exist, many narcissists are people who end up destroying themselves. For example, a narcissist may become addicted to drugs or alcohol, and because of their ego, refuse to seek treatment.
Many narcissists may end up exploding if they don’t get the treatment they believe they deserve. This can cause prison time or self-harm.
A narcissist may also engage in dangerous activities for the thrill, and then end up harming themselves.
What Creates a Narcissist?
Chances are, you’ve dealt with someone like this. So what has created them? Do all narcissists have a tragic origin story?
As of now, the exact causes are not known. It’s thought that narcissism is a combination of nature and nurture. Someone excessively spoiled may grow up to be a narcissist, but someone who was criticized quite often could be one as well. More males than females are narcissists. You can experience signs of early narcissism in teens and adulthood. However, a self-absorbed teen isn’t necessarily one.
Narcissist or Just Self-Centered?
Sadly, the term “narcissist” is a little abused, and some may call a person who is a little self-centered a narcissist. While being self-centered is a character flaw, it’s nowhere near as bad as being a narcissist.
However, the differences can sometimes be hard to figure out. Here are some ways to tell.
- A narcissistic person will have no empathy for others. Meanwhile, a person who is a little self-centered will still have care for other people and is able to put themselves in another person’s shoes.
- A self-centered person may like attention, but they will allow others to get attention as well. Meanwhile, a narcissist will attack anyone they believe is stealing their attention.
- A narcissistic person tends to have no disregard for the rules. Someone who is a little self-centered may try to bend the rules a little, but they will still obey them at the end of the day.
Narcissism is a spectrum. There are people so narcissistic that they would never seek treatment, as they believe there’s nothing wrong with them. Some can be roped into therapy by being told it can make them even better, but that doesn’t apply to everyone.
However, people with mild cases may have enough self-awareness to seek treatment. Narcissists may benefit from talk therapy or medication used to treat their symptoms.
With that said, it’s not up to you to treat a narcissist. If you have a person in your life who is one, do not try to please them. It can end up exhausting you in the end. Cutting out a toxic person from your life is sometimes needed, and not a sign of narcissism.
If you suspect you have narcissism, seeking help is important. First, go to Mind Diagnostics to see if you truly have it, and then seek treatment when you can.
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