Looking for the ideal Christmas gift for your Republican and Christian nationalist friends and relatives? Look no further!
After his stunning comeback against Kamala Harris, what better way to celebrate than with a piece of holy memorabilia that merges faith, patriotism, and… well, idolatry.
Behold: The Donald Trump and Jesus Christ Decorative Canvas Wall Hanging, now available on Amazon. Bound to be popular amongst 50.7% of the population. Here it is:
Source: Amazon
This 24 x 16-inch hanging features Donald Trump, backed by Jesus Christ, of course, standing proudly in front of the American flag. That’s right, the Holy Trinity — Trump, America, and Jesus Christ on one canvas print.
What a time to be alive!
It’s rare that you find both of the sons of God in one picture — two saviors for the price of one. And with Trump’s resurrection… err, I mean re-election, the timing couldn’t be better. Now that he’s back in office, why not cover your walls with a daily reminder of this holy alliance?
Get one for the home and the office. Heck, why stop there? Hang one in your living room, your bedroom, your kitchen, your dining room, your bar, and, of course, your bathroom. Who wouldn’t want to take a shit with Trump staring back at them?
Remind yourself wherever you are that Trump and Jesus are buddies who share a common goal. Don’t delay! Take care of your Christmas shopping in one fell swoop by purchasing the Donald Trump and Jesus Christ canvas wall hanging.
And if you want to go the extra mile — just like Jesus teaches — then throw in a copy of Helgard Müller’s brand new book: President Donald J. Trump, The Son of Man — The Christ, also for sale on Amazon.
Here’s the book cover:
Source: Amazon
You’ll definitely want this sitting on your coffee table when guests come over. In fact, maybe buy a few extra copies, just in case. After all, it’s the perfect icebreaker for any Christmas gathering. Who could resist a conversation starter like this one? Get a load of the introduction to the book:
Amazing!
Yes, Helgard Müller skillfully joins the dots of Biblical prophecy and links them to none other than Donald J. Trump. His book claims that there are two Christs, with Jesus being the son of God, who was betrayed by Judas, and Trump being the son of man who was betrayed by former U.S. President Mike Pence.
Ain’t that the truth?!
If you’re looking for some wildly irresponsible use of scripture, look no further. And if bald-faced idolatry is your thing, this book is for you.
It’s hard to imagine a more appropriate gift in a year where Trump’s comeback feels to his supporters like the Resurrection itself. Forget about traditional nativity scenes and classic holiday décor — this is the real spirit of Christmas, 2024-style. Each purchase will remind you of the ongoing fight for “truth” and “freedom” under the leadership of a man who, according to Müller, holds the very destiny of mankind.
Get the wall hanging and the book this Christmas. Celebrate the birth of Christ this year by misrepresenting him and everything he stands for.
While stocks last!
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This post was previously published on Backyard Church.
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