You are casually scrolling through Instagram or any other social media for that matter, looking at those beautiful faces, perfect body — attractive people. Internally wishing you had what they’ve and being a little upset with your self every time you get off of it.
We can’t deny the fact that as a society we’re so obsessed with how a person looks that we tend to ignore how their personality is — which shouldn’t be the case really.
People including myself and even those attractive people you see on your socials, are so insecure about their physical appearances that they try to change themselves to ‘fit-in’ and look absolutely perfect — which is where we go wrong, because there’s no such thing as perfect face, perfect lips, perfect eyes, perfect nose, perfect body. If you’ve ever noticed, the definition of ‘perfect’ eventually changes with time.
Perfect — is an illusion. We need to embrace who we are, with our own uniqueness.
Let’s admit it, beautiful face and a bad personality wouldn’t work long-time but beautiful soul, well you can take a guess. The attractive face and body doesn’t last forever, it’s eventually going to fade with time but an attractive personality sure does, so why not focus on those aspects and work towards them.
Here, I’m going to tell you 8 things that would help you be an actual attractive and influential person, and which has nothing to do with how you look.
…
#1 Confidence
They say your best accessory is Confidence and true to their words, it’s probably one of the sexiest thing anyone can have. The faces confidence alone can turn and the attention it holds makes you the most attractive person in the room.
Confident people are easygoing, know their worth, aren’t afraid to take charge, charismatic, collected, calm and self-assured. And this is what precisely makes them so intoxicating to be around. Now, confidence doesn’t come in one day but as they say — fake it until you make it!
Confidence is everything. It doesn’t let you get intimidated.
…
#2 Uniqueness
We all are guilty for being trying to be someone we’re absolutely not, can never be. But why do we that? Well yeah, to fit in, get accepted by others.
I believe we’re somewhere afraid that we would become an outcast if we don’t act/behave like everyone else. I was doing the same for the longest time I can remember back in school, but now I say, ‘Screw this!’ I’m going to embrace my authentic self and if that doesn’t go well with someone else then it’s their loss, not mine. I don’t have to pretend something I’m not and it gives me such relief and happiness.
What would be a world if we’re all the same? Incredibly boring! All of us are different, our uniqueness makes us appealing, more attractive & fascinating. Originality is sexy.
…
#3 Availability
In today’s time, we have made it cool to ignore people, be distant and less available, as if that’s make you desirable or appealing to others. But on the contrary, it does the opposite.
We usually believe that being less available — many a times intentionally — would make the other person miss us and get them more interested while all that happens in reality is they lose interest. People are already lonely in our age & time, why make it worse? Being there for them both physically & emotionally makes you attractive.
We don’t realize how important and attractive it is to be available for someone, be reliable, to give them time, to make them feel like they belong.
…
#4 Intelligence
What’s more attractive than a person knowing exactly what they’re saying and being knowledgeable and witty?
You’re right.
Nothing!
Intelligence being an attractive trait can never let you down, as it often leads to stimulating conversations, deep insight, and an interesting new way of looking at the world.
…
#5 Vulnerability
I don’t know if it’s just me but I’ve noticed people pulling on a hard exterior always, being emotionless and rude is the new cool.
People are afraid to be vulnerable, honest in front of each other which is somehow understandable to a certain point — they’ve had some bad experiences. But having said that don’t let that define you, being vulnerable doesn’t make you a weak person.
Being able to talk about something that makes vulnerable doesn’t only make you strong or appealing — it also gives the other person space to be vulnerable too, to confide in you. It helps in building trust & respect.
…
#6 Passion
On a personal level whenever I hear someone talk about their ambition with the urge and passion that their eyes glint — it instantly makes them attractive to me.
And for a fact I know it’s not just me, people in general find passionate & ambitious people more likeable. Someone wanting to do better is attractive. Growth mindset is attractive.
Passionate people have determination to achieve their dreams/goals, they’re driven, self-motivated and inspiring. Others around them push themselves to do better as well.
…
#7 Kindness
Today, we need more kindness than ever. We’ve come to a point where if someone is being kind, people usually think they’ve an ulterior motive and it’s disheartening to see people losing their faith over kindness. There’s so much power in kindness, we don’t even realize.
If you want to see how a person really is, pay attention to the way they treat others — especially people below in rank to them. Are they compassionate? Kind? Respectful? Accepting of others? If not, you would want to give a second thought about them.
Life is only so much hard for all of us, no one would want a person who’s rude and cruel, in their lives to add on. Have a little acceptance and respect for others, it would go a long way.
Sprinkle a little kindness everywhere you go, you might end up making someone’s day a little better.
…
#8 Sense of Humor
Last in the list but definitely not the least, good humor. In fact the first thing that comes to our mind when asked ‘What do you find attractive in a person beside looks?’ We all think of a good sense of Humor.
Everybody loves a person who can make them laugh and lighten up their days with their cleverness & wit.
…
To conclude —
- Confidence
- Uniqueness
- Availability
- Intelligence
- Vulnerability
- Passion
- Kindness
- Sense of Humor
There’s so much more to it.
—
This post was previously published on medium.com.
***
From The Good Men Project on Medium
 |
 |
 |
 |
***
Join The Good Men Project as a Premium Member today.
All Premium Members get to view The Good Men Project with NO ADS.
A $50 annual membership gives you an all access pass. You can be a part of every call, group, class and community.
A $25 annual membership gives you access to one class, one Social Interest group and our online communities.
A $12 annual membership gives you access to our Friday calls with the publisher, our online community.
Register New Account
Need more info? A complete list of benefits is here.
—–
Photo credit: Sam McNamara on Unsplash
