Today I Want to Write About Hurt

I wanted to write about it because I am guilty.

We have this incredible power within us to hurt others. To drag them down. Bring them to their knees. To have them cower and destroy their self-esteem. It does not take much, maybe just a few words. The words that WE know will bring them there.

As I sat down to make a social media post for my art account, I knew I wanted to do a throwback to an older piece. I decided on “Reflections” to channel what I wanted to say.

I think of the times when we stumble, very badly. Not the “oops” kind. But the kind where we go “I have done f$%ked up.” When we are not only not our best self, but a self that we want hidden away for the rest of our lives, never to see the light of day. But here it goes, it shows up.

And this is the time where we end up hurting someone, very badly. Causing them unimaginable pain.

What’s next?

Then it’s the heavy and quiet morning when we’re left looking in the mirror. And we see not our face, but our mistakes staring back at us. It’s not very pretty. We feel naked, vulnerable, shameful.

Soon, there is this moment. The moment after, in the early morning light. A soft ray gently falls on our faces, and we make a promise. A promise to ourselves.

To be better. To change the script forward. To be kinder.

It’s looking at our power to heal, our power to be gentle, our power to be good.

This is not about regret or guilt, but truly growing and learning, for our own good. Our life depends on it.

It’s about showing back up, with a little more wisdom, a little more heart.

And this is also not about making amends and apologizing. It’s about transforming, seeing our cracks and flaws, and deciding that we are truly going to change.

—

This post was previously published on medium.com.

***

From The Good Men Project on Medium

What Does Being in Love and Loving Someone Really Mean?

My 9-Year-Old Accidentally Explained Why His Mom Divorced Me

The One Thing Men Want More Than Sex

The Internal Struggle Men Battle in Silence

***

Join The Good Men Project as a Premium Member today.

All Premium Members get to view The Good Men Project with NO ADS.

A $50 annual membership gives you an all access pass. You can be a part of every call, group, class and community.
A $25 annual membership gives you access to one class, one Social Interest group and our online communities.
A $12 annual membership gives you access to our Friday calls with the publisher, our online community.