How many times have you thought of “stepping out” on your partner? How many times have you actually “stepped out”? Never mind. Don’t answer that. It’s none of my business. I’m not here to judge.
I’m here to share something with you. We all know and understand what convenience is, right? Or do we?
I have a theory on convenience and what it has to do with “stepping out.” Men. We don’t “step out” or cheat unless it’s convenient for us. A lot of guys may get mad with me for divulging such secrets. But. I’m a writer. I’m about to reveal everything.
I make enemies. I live on. End of story.
Any who. If the situation is not convenient for the man, it will not ever evolve to a “stepping out” situation. If it’s not a convenient situation, we do not get involved with it. We don’t have time to sneak around and trick and treat. Contrary to popular belief. We want the convenience of stability and security. And we can’t be sure and secure with the idea of messing around with you if it’s not a stable relationship. And by stable, I mean, a relationship that is open and trustworthy. If you have a man or he has a woman, be up front about that. Lay your cards down, face up. That way, the game is played fair and square. “No cuddling, no French kissing. What part of the jump off are you missing?”
I wasn’t always an Honest Abe. I never “stepped out” on my wife, but I have been with women who were “stepping out” on their man. Back in the day, when I was single. And a bit more heartless, of course. I didn’t care who I was with. I didn’t care who you was with. My motto was.”‘If you can’t be with who you love, love who you with.” And because I made the women really feel my motto, they were able to let go of their fears, ethics and morals. Then, the situation becomes convenient. For women, when feelings and emotions are unattached, it is easy to make bad decisions with no remorse. i.e., convenient.
It is natural for a man to be without remorse. It is second nature for a man to want more than one woman at a time. We are conquerors. And it is an innate ability that we conquer things. Be those things countries, goals or women. We set out to conquer and acquire as much as we can. This is the part of the male psyche females tend to misunderstand.
I don’t mean to justify the actions of a cheating man, or a woman, for that matter. I only wish to draw some sort of understanding to the “why.” Why do people risk jeopardizing a happy home over a new home? Why do people go for the chance at a one night stand, that could ruin a relationship, when they could just stay at home where they belong? Well. If it’s convenient to shop at the store right down the street as opposed to driving five miles to the super market for the same items. Go down the street. That’s why most of those corner stores are called convenience stores.
It’s convenient to shop for the same items that are at the supermarket. Get what I’m saying?
Of course, some people have problems like sex addiction and what not. But, for the most part. I would say, about 85 percent of the population, “step out” out of convenience. The other 15 percent may be addicted, probably even bitter and burned. But whatever the reason, it’s only a small group of “steppers” that do it because there is some sort of emotion attached to the situation. Less emotion and more sea motion. It ain’t the size of the boat. It’s the motion in the ocean.
I ask you, does this sound like the kind of person you want to be or want to even be associated with? If they are heartless in their personal relationships, chances are they will one day become heartless in their platonic relationship with you. Do you want to deal with that?
Just as convenient as it is to be distrustful in personal relationships, that same person can find it equally as easy to betray those in their platonic life. Dogs will be dogs is not just an idiom about furry four-legged friends. This saying can very well be equated to humans. To humans with the nature of said four-legged friends. What are we really to expect from a dog? I hate when a person asks a dog owner if the dog bites? Of course he does. He got teeth, don’t he? Oh. You mean, will he bite you? Only if you provoke him.
Then, why is it such a surprise when a married person “steps out” on their spouse? Tell you what. Five surefire ways you can tell the person is going to cheat on you. 1) The person just can’t keep a plan together. They break plans and their word like a fifty cent pair of eyeglasses. 2) The person can’t look you in the eye. Anyone who practices deception, will not look other people in the eyes. The eyes are the soul. 3) You have yet to meet their family or friends. They want to keep you a secret from the obvious. The main chain. 4) Things just aren’t the same with them. They never want to go to common or repeat places. They may be seen with you by someone they are keeping you a secret from. 5) They tell you. Seven out of ten cheaters will tell you they will cheat on you. Listen for the signs. “If I were going to do it. I’d do it like this.” “If I were going to cheat, I wouldn’t do XX to get caught.”
People will show you their true colors. People will proudly wave their flag of convenience. It is up to you to recognize when this happens.
(To be continued)
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Photo credit: Getty Images
Cookie. You are absolutely right. There is so much more to this topic that I chose not to touch on because I plan to in future articles. Thanks for your comment and appreciation.
What an awesome read, Saliek As a woman I appreciate your frank words regarding the cheating. My only caveat is what happens when the cheating is found out? The consequences can be a myriad of issues – some of which are easily resolvable, while others can cause a lifetime of pain, heartbreak, and confusion. I guess that unwanted (or maybe wanted?) pregnancies, disease, and broken families are not an issue, nor considered – in the “heat of the moment” or in the quest for convenience. Often we want to blame others for the way our lives have turned out, and… Read more »
Cookie. You are absolutely right. There is so much more to this topic that I chose not to touch on because I plan to in future articles. Thanks for your comment and appreciation.