We are not born with the knowledge of what our future holds. Most of the events in our life arrive as unprecedented. Even if we may have thought about it, we do not know how and what changes will occur around us. We do not choose our lifestyle, our family members, the people we meet, the society, and so on.
Whenever my friends come to know that I seek therapy to overcome my problems, analyze, and improve myself. They mostly tag me as being “Brave”!
And I am always curious, “Why am I brave for seeking help?!”
As surprising it may sound, it is indeed true that not many people develop the courage to acknowledge the wrong in their life and say yes to psychotherapy. At the same time, not all societies take it positively. Meanwhile, there are a lot of us who grew up NOT to think about ourselves, our comfort, and our needs, and use the word “No.”
. . .
Mental illness is a part of our daily living.
We get emotionally damaged, we get depressed, we forgive, and become happy. The degree and grade of the effect of such events, then decide where our relationships might be heading, which might involve friends, family, or even ourselves.
As an ordinary being, it is often hard to recognize our behaviors might be affecting others as much as ourselves. At the same, repeated actions define how our lifestyle is and where we will land into in the future.
Being aware of the now helps us to resume our journey to help attract what we want in our life — happiness, love, value, and respect.
It has been almost five years now that I have been seeing therapists. Currently, I have two wonderful women. They are sweet, charming, and the most supportive people I have ever met. They have become my closest people and probably will be next to my partner.
Because I am too crazy?
No, because I moved to a different city.
But that is the perk there. Your therapist will remain beside you regardless of where you stay and the distance.
. . .
Reasons to seek help through psychotherapy
Self-love is the one important reason to seek help.
When you acknowledge your hurt, difficulties, and want to improve yourself, your surroundings, and breakthrough the distress, it is to LOVE your SELF.
You are acknowledging the fact that you are worthy of all the goodness the world has. As well, recognizing when something is wrong, it is incorrect, and you deserve justice, love, and trust.
It helps to develop self-confidence as well as the sense that when no one cares for you, YOU are there for yourself. YOU will bring happiness back to your life. YOU will achieve whatever you want in this life.
As I was reading an article on Medium the other day, regarding Emotional Damages, it made me realize that another reason to choose therapist over your friends or the closest family member, is to avoid getting biased responses. At the same time, I was unintentionally hurting or rubbing on some else’s scars.
In my experience, I have a personal issue of not finding people who are ready to listen to me without judgment and without spreading my own stories to others. Especially when it comes to relationships and behavioral issues.
At the same time, it makes complete sense because not everyone develops the insight to analyze the relationship and characteristic faults and provide constructive solutions.
However, the therapists do. It is their job, and they learned how to create a safe, loving, and trustworthy environment.
They know how to suggest, understand, and respect our needs. So, this brings to the next question of choosing the therapist who is compatible with you.
How to choose the correct one
They are human beings too. And they have their individualities.
Choose your therapist carefully and with time. They are all magnificent human beings. However, each one of them has their strategies.
Do some background research on their career and history. Ask recommendations and stories that can tell you more about their personalities.
Seek compatibility in terms of how much open that therapist wants you to be as well, whether you feel their values will reflect yours. We come from different societies, and our backgrounds vary a lot; so does our mindset towards approaching life.
You have to feel comfortable to open up to him/her every intimate detail without hesitation.
Your relationship with your therapist
Treat them as your best friend as well as your parent. For me, it was essential to feel that bond because I needed to allow myself to accept their suggestions to help with my situations. I have to listen to them.
Personally, the relationship is as amazing as falling in love with your partner. You have subtle boundaries that they will never cross at the same time, you know they will always be there beside you regardless of the circumstances.
Make them your friend who will laugh as well as cry with you. Respect them when they find your faults and correct you.
. . .
We all are complex beings, and life is short.
Each one among us has the characteristics that make us unique. It is worth saying YES when it comes to self-help and self-improvement.
Every week, I am transforming into a new, improved person, and it is a step towards what I cherish to become in my life. Sometimes it requires risks and considerable leaps to bring in positive developments in our life. I have taken many detours and have lost many relationships. At the same time, I have gained some valuable ones. And I happily embrace those changes.
It is twisted and hard during those moments as well as sweet like a Nutella at the end.
However, it is worth reminding ourselves that we all are entitled to and deserve peace and success in our life. We deserve respect and love. It is worth standing up against what demeans us as well as lowers our self-esteem.
Hence, seek psychotherapy. We all need that one person to guide us towards the right path.
This post was previously published on Change Becomes You and is republished here with permission from the author.
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