“I wish someone would of told me as a boy how much work it would take to be great” is a thought John Turner hopes others will reflect on when raising their own boys.
I’m not that old of a man. I’m only 32 years old, but I’m truly blessed to have seen the 32 years that I have seen in my life. I saw my mother get buried when I was only 14 years old. I really wish I would have told her “I love you” more, because not every day is promised to you. I wish sometimes I would have known that not everyone is going to be happy about your life and your success. The same people that are here with you today won’t necessarily be with you tomorrow. Maybe I would have been a lot wiser with my heart, feelings, emotions, and the things that I shared with people. You know, what I wish I would have known when I was a boy…is that everyone around you isn’t doing as well as they perceive to be. Not every smile is one of true joy and happiness. Some smiles are ones that are there covering up a lot of pain and hurt. Some smiles are those which come with evil thoughts behind them. There are some smiles though, that are of real love, support, and appreciation. At the end of the day, so much hides behind a smile.
I wish someone would have told me as a boy how much work it would take to be great. I think as kids we get a little spoiled by what we see. Our parents do an amazing job of providing for us and we as kids really do not know all the things that our parents had to do like putting clothes on our backs, shoes on our feet and food on the table. When we went to the refrigerator as kids, we always expected food to be in it. When we went to the light switch to switch it on, we always expected the light to come on. When we went to the telephone to make a phone call, we always expected to hear a dial tone. I wish I knew as a boy that sometimes, the food that appeared in the refrigerator came from food stamps and government assistance. I wish I would have known those long hours my parents had to work came with little pay and were just enough to keep those lights on at our house. I wish I would have known that sometimes our parents had to ask friends or family for money, or asked for bill extensions because they just didn’t have the money at some of those times to keep the phone service going. I wish someone would have told me these things as a boy because maybe, I wouldn’t have left those lights on, threw away my vegetables, or stayed on the phone extra late all those nights.
I wish someone would have told me as a boy that true love is rare. Not everyone that you grow up with or see every day truly loves you. They are not always going to have your best interest in mind and not everyone is here in life to see you make it and prosper. Your heart and love are precious things of which not everyone should be entitled too. Not everyone is worth the time, efforts, and hard work that you put into them and not everyone is going to appreciate all the love that you give to them. I wish someone would have told me as a boy to be more careful with the love that I give. I wish I knew the love that I give is not to be taken for granted. If my love, however was taken for granted, I wish I knew to to pull it back and making sure to only give it away to someone who gives it back to me 100% as strongly as I gave it to them. I wish someone would have told me as a boy that it was ok to cry, it was ok to feel, it was ok to be in touch with your inner self and feelings. I wish someone would have told me as a boy that we hurt sometimes as men. It’s ok to get help and ask for help if you need it. It doesn’t look weak for you as a man to love your family, love your kids, love your friends, love God, and love a woman with all your heart, soul, mind, and being. You’re not being WEAK, you’re not being SOFT, you’re not being A LITTLE BOY; you’re simply doing your very best to BE A MAN! Yeah…these are the things I wish someone would have told me as a boy. Maybe if someone would have, things would have been a little easier for me growing up and becoming a man.
Photo: Kelsey E/Flickr