What Is Your Partner’s New ‘Hobby’ to Avoid SEX?

“My husband has always been a TV ‘person,’ but for the past few years of Dead Bedroom, it’s become nearly a part-time job. His excuses for no sex are that he only wants to have sex at night, but then he’s too tired, or he wants to go to bed early, but then he’ll stay up late watching TV for HOURS.

The most frustrating part is that you can tell he’s forcing himself to be “busy.” He opens a streaming service, picks a show randomly, and watches the ENTIRE series. Usually, no-name, actors trash writing, etc. I’ll try to watch it with him so we at least DO SOMETHING as a couple, and it honestly is so bad. (I’m all for trash TV from time to time, but not binge-watching something every night)

I notice he’s not even enjoying it, so I ask how he likes the series. He says, “Meh,” or “It’s okay,” so I ask why he keeps watching it. Then he just shrugs.

Anything to “look busy” and avoid any physical contact….”

Oh, I get this. My ex was a TVaholic. Glued to the boob tube and the couch. Or work, or the phone. Or some combo of all the above.

Now, most people like TV. It’s easy entertainment, and there are endless viewing options. BUT, when it begins to interfere with spending any time with your family, it becomes a problem.

Some spouses combine TV with online shopping and TikTok. That’s the trifecta of “checking out.” They surf endlessly back and forth—one eye on the phone and one eye on the telly.

How do you compete with a phone? Or the TV? Or effin TikTok?

No one can.

You are the third or fourth choice, and it’s almost impossible to win. Your “partner” shows that spending time with you is not a priority.

What’s your partner’s new “hobby” to avoid sex?

r/deadroom veterans answered:

• Netflix flyovers and books with stories of connection that come at the expense of ours
• Always “working”
• Binge watches shows or goes to the bar to drink
• Endless video games
• “Quality” time together is watching on separate devices without touching or speaking

Turn off the TV. Put down your phone.
Make time for dates or activities that involve your heart. Don’t take your loved ones for granted.

Or risk becoming a mindless, socially avoidant, anxious, and detached husk of a person with a spouse who is hurting from lack of touch. A dead bedroom lurking in the shadows of your marriage.

Doing anything to avoid physical contact.

Your spouse will eventually get frustrated enough to take action.
“I’m not putting up with this any longer!”

Where will that lead?

Nowhere good, I assure you.
Cheating or leaving.

Someone else will take your place. They will show desire and appreciation for your partner where you didn’t. Don’t let avoidance with TV, work, phone, or games leave you alone for good. Make a change.

Who else has gone through this? Tell me in the comments.

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