What It Takes To Invest in a Platonic Relationship

Likewise, how would you feel if your girlfriend or wife had a male best friend?

There is nothing to be afraid of because there is nothing to lose— Fatunla Samuel

I, for one, believe one of the corniest relationships to keep is a platonic relationship. Do you agree?

Believe me!
You might take this with less concern if you don’t understand what it is or if you have never had one.

But if you are like me and have been in such a situation, I am sure you will know how tough it is to keep one. And if you have never been in one, well it’s better late than never to learn what it takes to invest in a platonic relationship.

FYI… Before you continue reading, here is an example of how I got myself into one.

A little story — This will be as short as possible.

I once had a female friend who was the best girl I had ever met in my life. Her attitude, zeal, knowledge, and beauty were so far from anyone else I had met on earth.

I thought she was the one, and guess what, I gave it my best. I did my best to woo her, but she never gave me a positive reply. Since I loved her spirit, I kept being friends with her till we unintentionally agreed to be platonic friends.

Little did I know that I had made an awful decision. It was not because I had other thoughts, but because it was my first experience of being in a platonic relationship.

Soon enough, keeping her company became harder every single time we met. I could not handle the emotional investment involved.

It is hard to invest in someone without getting something “else” in return…or so I thought. Those were my thoughts until I started to see the influence and positive sides of being in a platonic relationship.

What it takes to invest in a platonic relationship

This relationship can be a roller coaster for some. While for others, platonic relationships can be as smooth as a cappuccino.

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It could be all rosy and neutral till you mess things up with a single wrong move. And it could be worse if your platonic partner requires an action from you and you don’t show up with it.

In order to become neutral and invest in the relationship, try doing one or more of these things;

1.Be constantly positive:

It sure is not an easy task to always be there for a male or female friend when you probably already have a partner. It sure is quite hard to go through life adventures with the opposite sex without imagining what it would be like to run that track with them through life.

But if you do find yourself in this mirage, try to be positive and imagine having the mindset that through that friendship, you would have a lot more positive results that would outshine your selfish thoughts. Be constantly in tune with the positive things you have achieved since you have been friends with that person.

2. Erase your fears:

If you decide to keep a platonic relationship, make it as transparent as possible. Then you will have to live with the ability to erase your fears.

Delete the fears that come to your mind when you are both together. Disallow every thought of over-sensitivity that comes to play whenever they see someone new. Disregard every constant murmur of people mocking your friendship with them.

3. Do less than more:

Don’t get me wrong. I don’t mean this for every aspect of your platonic relationship. But to help create a serene and positive relationship.

Apply less pressure on sensitive acts like flirting, frivolous calls, and unwanted appraisals. Apply more pressure on things, like giving them needed advice, being a shoulder to cry on in times of need, and being that one go-to friend when things fall apart.

4. Consider them to be of the same gender:

Here’s a trick I found works for me. It might sound stupid, but it is one of the best ways to invest gravely in a platonic relationship.

If she is a P-friend, see her as one of your male friends or your G as you deem fit. If he is your P-friend, see him as your regular female friend, only this time with some masculinity.

Even if there are some awkward situations, this will help to cement strict trust for one another
All relationships require work, including platonic ones. So in some situations, there might be sudden mistakes, fights, and disagreements that might make you question the essence of the relationship. But keep flying that flag, for you don’t know who is your real friend. That platonic relationship might be one of your best relationships.

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This post was previously published on medium.com.

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