What’s the Most Popular Day for Joining Ashley Madison?

I looked at Ashley Madison. On February 15th.

It was so easy to post an ad looking for a lover.
I was ready to start an affair.

The endless disconnect at home. The sexlessness of my marriage. The sitting in different rooms night after night. No touching — my husband shrinking away as if burned.

All of it.

So many men were tired, as well.

“I remember what is sorely missing and look forward to being that missing piece. I’ll provide attention you deserve on all levels, for the right special lady.”

Sign me up.

“I’m looking for a lady to spoil, escape from the real world, and love every minute together.”

Oh, yes.

“Mmmm. You sound yummy. Let me take care of everything. You show up and we can share some private awesome hours together in a nice warm, hotel room under the covers. Let me explore your body and curl your toes.”

Tempting. I’m so horny.

“The ball is officially in your court. I’m ready whenever you are.”

I don’t want to second guess any longer.

“I liked your ad and would love the opportunity to make you smile. I think I could be quite good at that.”

Hmmm.

“Let’s escape the day-to-day and take a walk on the spicy side. I want to help you explore your limits and put a little fire into your life.”

I can’t…can I?

“I hope that I sparked just a little bit of interest that will make you reply. I promise you that it will definitely be worth your while.”

Worth my while?

“Hi there. You sound pretty interesting. I’d enjoy to hear more if you have time to talk.”

He sounds almost normal…

“I stumbled across your profile her and felt compelled to respond. I’m aware it is virtually impossible to find someone here. It seems that people want to play games, embellish or be dishonest. But I’m sincere and not into games…well, except for the naughty type.”

I smiled.

“Well, hello! What can I say? Who you’ve described in your write up — that guy is me! I have those qualities you’re looking for.”

You do?

This is where all the guys start to sound the same…

Who do I pick? I read profile after profile. Text until I am developing arthritis in my thumbs. Can I just have one guy text a good game, meet and be mutually attracted, know how to have an affair, and light me up in bed?

It’s like brokering a Middle East peace deal.
Decades pass and no one is any closer.

February 15th. Those day afters.
Those are the doozy’s that make adultery tangible.

Nothing happened on Valentine’s Day at home. Another day of disappointment. Another day of duty and obligation.

No romance.

I was ready to take the next step. Jump off the ledge. Would I find a guy who’d hold my hand as we lept?

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