When Goodbye Never Comes

These days, with all the technology and digital forms of communication, “ghosting” has become an all too common calamity.

“Ghosting” is when someone abruptly cuts off all communication with another person (usually a romantic interest or partner) without providing any explanation. The person who got “ghosted” receives no warning and feels empty without any closure.

Text messages are unanswered and phone calls are completely ignored. Typically, the person “ghosting” the other doesn’t even bother to block them. They just figure that no response is a response.

The person who is on the receiving end of this treatment often experiences feelings of confusion and emotional pain. Their self-esteem takes a serious blow.

Sometimes the victim of this emotional abuse actually worries about the abuser’s well-being at first.

“Ghosting” usually occurs after the initial form of a connection has been made in a budding romantic relationship, but does happen in more developed and advanced stages of relationships.

It’s an easy escape for the one who’s performing the “ghosting,” but it takes an emotional toll on the other who essentially is their victim.

This is a form of emotional abuse!

People most likely “ghost” someone because they’re too emotionally weak to have an uncomfortable conversation or even type a simple text message to provide that person with closure.

Some people are just not mature enough to respect other people’s feelings and others cannot comprehend the psychological impact of not communicating at all once they’ve established some amount of a connection with someone else.

For the victim of this emotional and psychological abuse, the ordeal can be very unnerving. Most people want closure when their connections and relationships come to an end. When communication is suddenly cut off as if the person died all of a sudden, it creates an empty feeling of uncertainty.

Are they okay? Did I say something? What did I do wrong? Etc.

These unanswered questions can cause someone to perseverate and ruminate. It will increase anxiety. It could even trigger post-traumatic stress in individuals with prior incidents of abandonment.

“Ghosting” is an emotionally and psychologically callous act to commit against someone. It inhibits the victim the ability to properly process the end of their relationship in a healthy way. While the abuser may be under the impression they’re sparing negativity, in reality, they’re selfishly prioritizing their own discomfort, insecurities, and blatant lack of confidence, over simple respect and empathy.

Stop “ghosting” people!

If you lost interest in someone that you’ve formed a connection with — tell them! Even a brief and direct text message is much more kinder than silence! A simple message providing a simple explanation will most likely give that person clarity.

If you’ve been the victim of “ghosting” try not to internalize it as a reflection of your worth. It’s really not about you, it’s about your abuser’s inability to handle emotional situations and their lack of confidence in themselves.

I try to avoid people who require instant gratification because they often make a low effort departure fast. For the most part, I stick to myself but when I do connect with someone, I choose to communicate openly and respectfully because, despite enduring emotional and psychological trauma my entire life, I am emotionally mature.

If I form a connection with someone else, I will respect their mental health and emotional well-being if I decide not to be involved with them any longer.

I’m sure most have heard of treating others the way they’d like to be treated. It’s not a cliché.

As always, thank you for reading and please feel free to provide your input in the comments section below.