Being ghosted by someone you’ve been talking to or dating can trigger an array of emotions. You might find yourself feeling sad, disappointed, betrayed… or just flat out confused.
The problem with being ghosted is that we often don’t know why. What causes someone to just stop talking to us?
As it turns out, we may have some answers. Let’s take a closer look at why people ghost.
5 Most Common Reasons People Ghost
A 2023 Forbes Health/OnePoll survey of 5,000 people who were actively dating in the United States delved into the most common reasons why people ghost. It’s worth noting that people were given the opportunity to choose more than one reason. Here are the most common reasons people ghost.
1. Different Expectations for the Relationship
Have you ever been ghosted by someone who was looking for something casual while you wanted a long-term, committed relationship — or vice versa? If so, you’re not alone. Having different relationship expectations was the most common reason for people to ghost, with 49% of survey respondents stating that this was their reason for ghosting someone.
2. Not Liking Their Personality
Have you ever met someone only to find that their personality just wasn’t for you? Instead of letting them know this was why you weren’t feeling it, you just ghosted them.
Not liking someone’s personality was the second most common reason to ghost someone. An overall 47% of survey respondents reported that this was their reason for ghosting.
3. Not Being Invested Enough to Respond
Ever ghost someone after having a few short conversations with them? You’re not alone. An average of 45% of respondents chose this as the reason why they ghosted someone. It’s worth noting that the survey also found that 2 out of 3 people have ghosted someone on a dating app, prior to meeting.
4. Not Finding the Other Person Attractive
We might meet someone in real life and find that we just aren’t attracted to them. Maybe they don’t look the same as they did in their photos or they simply aren’t what you were expecting. Rather than letting them know you’re not attracted to them, you ghost them instead.
This is what 39% report as the 4th most common reason they’ve ghosted someone.
5. Going Through a Hard Time in Their Personal Lives
Sometimes, being ghosted has absolutely nothing to do with you and everything to do with timing. According to 25% of survey respondents, the 5th most common cause of ghosting someone is going through a hard time in their personal lives, such as trouble at work.
Even though we might think that we did something to get ghosted, it might not have anything to do with us and everything to do with the other person.
The Bottom Line
While these are the five most common reasons people ghost, every situation is unique. There are so many circumstances that may cause someone to stop talking to you.
You can try to prevent being ghosted by matching with people who are looking for the same type of relationship and posting photos that are accurate to what you look like in real life. But if someone you’ve been talking to disappears, don’t take it too personally. Sometimes, they’re just going through a hard time in their own lives.
Being ghosted is a horrible feeling, but remember that the person who stopped talking to you did you a favor in the long run. They’re making room for the person who’s deserving of your love.
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This post was previously published on medium.com.
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From The Good Men Project on Medium
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Photo credit: Kinga Howard on Unsplash
