Why I Love Being a Grandmother More Than a Parent

Yesterday, I received a text: “Nanny, I’m passing by, can I drop in?” My heart leapt as I called back my grandson, now thirty, whom I seldom see these days since he lives all the way across the country in Western Australia.

He and his girlfriend are spending a year travelling around Australia in his brand-new, rugged four-wheel drive, BAD 279, a real beast of a vehicle.

As fate would have it, the start of his journey brought him right through grandparent territory.

Instantly, the questions tumbled out: Would he stay for lunch? Could he spend the night? To my delight, he did stay overnight. If only briefly, his visit truly made my day.

It swept me back to precious days when he was a little two-year-old, eagerly begging to swim in the spa at my beauty college, certain it was a luxurious, warm swimming pool.

I can still picture him dashing down the hallway at home, chasing after Harry the cocker spaniel, calling out “Arry” because those tricky “r” sounds eluded him. I remember the bumps on his head and scraped knees I kissed better, always with a soothing hug and sometimes an ice cream treat to ease the pain. So many beloved memories fill my heart.

Now, with four more grandsons, most of them in their teens and the youngest just ten, my joy in being a grandmother continues to grow. I find myself wishing they wouldn’t grow up too quickly. I used to tease them at five years old, saying, “I’ll put a brick on your head to keep you from getting any older.”

My once two-year-old Nathan, now thirty, assured me, “I won’t, Nanny!” Yet, here he is, tall and grown, proof that time slips by despite our best wishes. We laughed together at the memory, and before he left, he gave me the biggest, warmest hug.

Until next time, my heart remains full of gratitude for every moment shared, past and present.

Parenting is often described as one of life’s most rewarding and challenging roles. It is a journey filled with sleepless nights, endless responsibilities, and a love so deep it can hardly be put into words.

Yet, for me, a curious transformation occurred with the arrival of my grandsons. Suddenly, the world feels a bit softer, the laughter a little more generous, and the burdens of responsibility considerably lighter. This beautiful shift is why, for countless individuals, being a grandparent is not only different from parenting but, in many ways, even more joyful.

Here, I’ll explore the reasons why I, and I think so many others find grandparenting to be a distinct and deeply cherished stage of life just like me.

When I became a parent, every day felt like an experiment conducted in real time. I was learning on the job, navigating milestones, managing tantrums, and constantly second-guessing myself.

Yet with my grandchildren, I bring to the table decades of experience. I know now that spilled juice is not a catastrophe, and scraped knees heal faster than broken hearts. This wisdom allows me to respond with calmness, patience, and perspective that simply weren’t available to me as a new parent.

As a grandparent, I can see the bigger picture. I know that childhood is fleeting, that the days are long, but the years are short. This invaluable perspective shapes my approach. I am present, engaged, and far more relaxed, relishing moments I may have missed the first time around. The wisdom of age offers a serenity that allows me to truly savour every giggle, every story, and every bedtime snuggle.

My role is not to set the rules, but to support them. I can focus on building a relationship with my grandchildren, unburdened by the minutiae of everyday discipline and routine.

Yes, I offer guidance and wisdom, but I do so from a place of support rather than primary authority. I am not the one who has to make the tough calls or enforce every rule. Instead, I get to be the safe harbour, the confidant, and the partner in mischief.

The love I feel for my children is boundless, but it was also intertwined with my hopes, dreams, and sometimes, my fears for their future.

With my grandchildren, the love is just as deep, but it feels lighter, less fraught with expectation. I have the privilege of loving them for exactly who they are, without the weight of shaping their destiny. My job is to delight in their quirks, champion their interests, and provide a sanctuary of acceptance. I can be their cheerleader and their comforter, free from the pressure to mould or direct.

There is a unique bond that exists between grandparents and grandchildren, one that is distinct from any other relationship.

One of the greatest joys of being a grandparent is the opportunity to pass on family traditions, stories, and values. I can share tales of my own childhood, teach beloved recipes, and help my grandchildren understand where they come from. This sense of continuity, of being a thread in the fabric of our family’s story, is incredibly meaningful.

Interestingly, grandparenthood has also deepened my relationship with my own children. I have a newfound appreciation for the challenges they face as parents, and I am able to offer support, encouragement, and empathy.

Our conversations are richer, our understanding deeper. Watching my children become parents in their own right is a source of immense pride and joy, and it has brought us closer together as a family.

Parenting and grandparenting are both profound journeys, each with its own joys and challenges. Yet, for me, being a grandparent has unlocked a new dimension of love and happiness.

Perhaps what I cherish most about being a grandparent is the opportunity to be fully present for my grandchildren, to be a source of joy, comfort, and inspiration, and to experience the world anew through their eyes.

In this golden chapter of life, love not only endures … it flourishes.

Thanks for reading dear friends and grandparents ღ.

© Stephanie Roberts