There was a time in my life where I assumed that people were aware of what I was doing and they would know when it was time for me to be promoted, applauded or committed to. My wake-up call was when I was in a job and after several years of working really hard, I was still in the same position.
A higher position opened up and I expected them to give it to me. I thought I was the obvious choice, but they didn’t come to speak with me about it. Instead, my manager asked me to schedule the appointments for the people they were planning to interview.
I went home that night and had a full conversation with myself. After ranting and raving, I decided that I had to have a discussion with my Manager. I put myself on her calendar. I gathered my courage, walked into her office and demanded to know why I wasn’t being considered for the job opening.
Her response was nonchalant, but not dismissive. She said that she didn’t think I wanted the position. I was taken aback because I wondered why she thought I was working so hard, but I took the opportunity to let it be known that I was interested.
She nodded and told me what I needed to do to be considered.
I was given a project to complete and I needed to formally submit my resume. I took all the steps, did my best on the project and interviewed with my Manager and her Manager.
If this was a movie, they would have called me into their office where all my co-workers were applauding. I would shake my Manager’s hand and they would congratulate me.
That is not what happened.
My manager called me into her office and told me they chose someone else for the position. She said it was a small difference between me and the other person, but they chose the other person.
I felt defeated for several days when my Manager’s boss called me and asked me to find a quiet place so she could speak with me. She apologized that they chose someone else but let me know that they valued my work. She said that she didn’t want to lose me as an employee.
As I listened to her talk, I could have just appreciated her kind words and waited for another opportunity to open up. But, that’s not what I did.
Author Chester Karrass said: “You don’t get what you deserve. You get what you negotiate.”
I spoke candidly with her boss. I explained the things I had accomplished during my years with the company. I didn’t assume my supervisor had relayed everything I did. I detailed the ways I helped my team win. She was impressed.
By the end of the conversation, she told me to write a proposal for a position I would like to do within the company and submit it to her.
I took no time and she had a proposal within days. I wrote everything I thought I could do and I wanted to do.
I was offered a position with an improvised title and a new salary. The job description was based on my proposal word-for-word. The only caveat was I would have to hire my replacement and I would have to work both jobs until I found one. It took me about a month until I could transition into my new position.
I felt the satisfaction of creating a job for myself and the freedom of it being crafted to my strengths and interests. If I had never said anything and just accepted the rejection, I probably would have worked the same job until I became fed up and then left the company.
There are times in life where you have to be willing to step up and ask for what you deserve. You can’t assume that other people know what you deserve or that they will give it to you without prompting. Sometimes, you have to plant the idea or communicate how you feel before they consider that you are ready to move to the next level.
Before you take the step, you have to be certain that if you don’t get the answer you want to hear that you are prepared to get what you want even if it means walking away. When opportunity presents itself, you have to take the leap of faith.
Your confidence comes from knowing you are worth it and if you are worth it then you have to know that someone else will give it to you. Being an advocate means speaking up for a cause that is important to you. What better cause is there than you, your family or your hard work?
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This post is republished on Medium.
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