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A heart without a dream is like a bird without feathers. Dreams are what constitute life and give it meaning. Our dreams allow us to soar, give us something to aspire to, and in some cases, something to live for. The day we stop dreaming is the day that we truly start dying for within our dreams lie our possibilities, greatest hopes, and purpose.
I believe Abraham Maslow listed self-actualization atop the hierarchy of human needs because he understood man’s innate desire to succeed and achieve self-fulfillment in life. All human beings desire to feel accomplished in different areas of their life and want to know that their life has purpose and meaning; this is the very reason people have dreams and chase after them.
Being in union with another requires us to consider everything that encompasses their entire being; their desires, needs, thoughts, fears, concerns, hopes, and aspirations. Part of loving our partners entails understanding their ambitions; what inspires them, what makes them tick, what they derive their pride from, etc., and supporting those ambitions even when they don’t line up with our own, challenge our own limiting beliefs or scare us because they pose a threat to our partners or unions, or require us to make sacrifices we might not be too keen on.
The person we choose to partner with in life can make or break us because often, they are the person who has the greatest influence and impact on us and in our lives. One of the most important qualities people seek out in a partner is someone they can count on to support their dreams. The following are ways we can become that partner ourselves and support our loved one’s dreams even if they scare us to death:
Make it a point to understand their “Why”
The reason we, at times, fail to support other people’s dreams or vice versa is that we don’t understand the “Why” behind their dreams. The most vital thing you can do that would help you identify how you can best support your partner’s dreams is to understand the “why” behind their dream and what accomplishing it would mean to them. You can determine this by having an intimate conversation with your partner; allow yourself to hear him or her out objectively, ask the necessary questions that will help you understand why their dream means as much as it does to them and express your thoughts or concerns to them without making the conversation about yourself, this will ensure you’re both on the same page and help you determine how to move forward.
Don’t rain on their parade with your fears
It is challenging to remain level-headed and optimistic when our partner’s dreams scare us; some dreams are nerve-wracking because they pose an element of danger, unpredictability, and risk—those are often the kind of dreams we struggle with getting on board with. As much as we might want to dissuade our partners from pursuing such dreams, we shouldn’t, as in doing so we would indirectly be communicating to them that their dreams aren’t worthy of our support because they don’t line up with our personal hopes and desires for them. When it comes to our partner’s hopes and aspirations, our job is to be their support system and not the person who holds them back.
Be willing to make sacrifices
Most dreams require us to make sacrifices of some sort for us to achieve them, our level of sacrifice always equates our level of success as far as many things in life are concerned. Part of supporting our partner’s dreams will entail us having to make some sacrifices alongside our partners whether those sacrifices involve our time, money, comforts and security. Use your discernment to determine the sacrifices your partner’s dreams warrant and discuss with your partner how you can both make and meet those sacrifices without them introducing and creating unnecessary chaos and disruptions in your lives.
Determine how you can be of assistance to them
The best way you can support your partner is by positioning yourself as their helpmeet–someone who is willing to go the extra mile with and help them bring their vision to fruition. Ask your partner what type of role they would like you to play in helping them accomplish their dreams, and determine the gifts, skills or resources you can personally bring to the table that will support them in making things happen. Two heads are better than one; you’ll both discover that you can accomplish and get a lot more done if you choose to work alongside each other and as a team especially if your strengths and gifts compliment each other.
Be their biggest cheerleader
Never underestimate the power of positive encouragement and affirming words when it comes to supporting your partner to achieve their dreams. Positively affirming your partner will go a long way in helping them shift their mindset to one of possibility and reinforce to them your belief in them. Be your partner’s biggest cheerleader; let him or her know that not only are you there for them when they need you but that you’re also proud of them for pursuing their dreams. Be there to give them a pep talk whenever they’re feeling discouraged and want to give up on their dreams and help them get up when they fall; let your words and actions convey your support—they need to know that they can count on you to meet them at the finish line when they get there.
Recognize and celebrate their milestones
Another great way to show your partner that you support their dreams is by recognizing their milestones and celebrating their successes and victories with them. Always acknowledge, applaud and support your partner’s accomplishments and milestones no matter how trivial they might appear to him or her. Choosing to celebrate their progress will motivate them to forge on with their pursuits and dream even bigger dreams—don’t hesitate to let your partner know just how proud of them you are.
What things can you start doing today to show your partner that you support their dreams?
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